


on still water

by whisperedsilvers



Category: Naruto
Genre: F/M, but then i changed my mind, i think, i'll put a note, it splits off from chronological order at part fifteen, it started following the manga, shisui needs some love, sometimes it's about the moments in between, sometimes it's not about the big plots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-28
Updated: 2019-05-03
Packaged: 2019-08-09 06:15:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 29,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16444391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whisperedsilvers/pseuds/whisperedsilvers
Summary: and sometimes, there are days without rain. —shisui/sakura





	1. taste of war

.

.

.

It smells like amber. Burning amber, darkening into a charred piece of flint and smoky like black plumes. The taste of fire — if anything — is always increasingly difficult to explain, it’s sometimes too much, overwhelming sparks of heat and the nearly heart-stopping stutters of dry air. It’s like choking on something too great or too little to swallow.

“You okay?” Ino asked, her blue eyes tinged with something a little more than knowing, almost as if she were waiting for a specific answer.

Sakura blinked, clearing her throat she replied, “Yeah.”

It was nearing five in the afternoon, with the sun settling gold over her wooden desk, the wind curling over her like a living thing, but disappearing altogether when she touched her shoulder self-consciously. Nine to fives were a blessing in disguise, it was slow in the hospital — surprisingly, but Kakashi had explained prior to his mission in Tea that things were _always_ slow during peacetime.

But she had gotten a taste of war during the Chunin exam. Orochimaru’s defection, the death of the Third Hokage and the faded memories of the Forest of Death were enough to have her tighten her grip on training, because she just didn’t really _understand._ Even at twenty, as head medic of the hospital, her instincts – perhaps her paranoia – there was always something.

_Something._

Intuition, she and Tsunade both believed, was an important skill to have as a shinobi. While they, mere humans could not predict the future – no matter what forbidden jutsu Sasuke _waved_ in her face – there was _something_. Maybe it was because she was a _child_ , maybe because she saw things she wasn’t meant to see or maybe, because she finally _grew up_ — there was never any real closure.

She may have been in peacetime now, but it was only a matter of time before something happens.

“Actually,” Sakura started, she closed her manila folder and stood up, “I’m kind of hungry. Wanna grab some dinner?”

Ino flickered her eyes over to the clock, she wrinkled her nose, “It’s kind of early.”

“We can take our time then,” Sakura curled her lips up, “We can go to that new dumpling shop around the corner.”

Blue eyes glittered, “Mimi’s? _Finally_ , I’ve been dying to go to that place!”

“Of course, pig.”

* * *

Unfortunately, dinner never came. Ino had been called to T&I and Sakura took her time walking to Ichiraku.

“—don’t know what you’re talking about! Wind chakra is _totally_ better than _fire_ ,” Naruto’s voice sounded congested, probably stuffed with noodles and whatever pork he managed to shove into his mouth, “It’s practically rare and the most—”

“You know,” Sakura started, she pushed the banner over her head and walked towards the counter, “I can hear you five shops down right?”

Sasuke snorted.

“Sakura-chan!” Naruto smiled with teeth, “I thought you were in the hospital?”

“Eh, it’s pretty slow since the chunin exams,” Sakura wrinkled her nose, she supposed she should be grateful, less injuries means a higher mortality rate for shinobi, but it was almost _stagnant_ if she thought about it. Did it make her a bad person to think of things like this? She pressed her lips together and ordered the festive gyoza.

“Isn’t that a good thing?”

“Yeah,” she said.

Sasuke stared at her.

Their dynamic as a team was always a power-play between, who had a better, much more deadly jutsu or who was faster or whose aim was more accurate, but amongst themselve,s it was always a matter of _how much more._ It was harder for her more than ever, now that they were competing for ANBU exams, despite her being a medic – she was beginning to resent the title – she didn’t possess any skills noteworthy enough to be even _considered_ ANBU material.

Sakura’s family was not from a _clan_ nor did she have any special bloodline ability or anything for that matter. Her parents are first generation shinobi, though they didn’t get very far in their career, they were content with being just that—they didn’t, _couldn’t_ understand their daughter’s desire for more.

They _couldn’t_.

Chakra control, monstrous strength, and her medical ninjutsu were enough to get her a Jounin position, but it wasn’t enough to cut it for ANBU. Despite the lack of medics there were in the ranks, they wouldn’t accept candidates that were anything less than ideal to join their ranks. Medical ninja in the force and medical ninja in ANBU had a different set of protocol, or so she heard.

Sakura’s lips thinned as she chomped on her last piece of gyoza.

“—ra-chan. Are you listening?” Naruto’s voice was kind of loud, but it was the poke of his chopsticks against her shoulder bone that knocked her out of her stupor.

“What?”

Sasuke rolled his eyes, “Kakashi said that we should meet for training tomorrow.”

She raised a brow, “What do you mean by _we_?”

The blonde frowned, “Like, all of us?”

Sakura had grown resentful over the years, sure it was dark and creeping like shadows over the mountains, but it was tight and constrained in the deepest parts of her, she relaxed her spine and tried to distract herself, “Isn’t he on a mission?”

“He should be back by tonight,” Naruto said, leaning back into the stool he explained, “He said it was a simple recon mission. Shouldn’t take too long.”

Sakura’s eyebrows furrowed.

_Recon?_

Tsunade hadn’t told her about any chatter that she picked up or perhaps she was just being paranoid, but recon missions – according to the objective scrolls in the office – were typically created to keep new information in and remove the remaining threat.

But they were in _peacetime._

“Same place, then?”

Sasuke nodded.

Just as Sakura finished her tea, an explosion reverberated throughout the village—she stiffened and then the three of them _moved_. Leaping onto the roof, the three of them watched rubble and dust erupt from the Hokage mountain.

“Are they _insane_?” Naruto hissed, half in outrage and the other half in disbelief, “Who bombs the Hokage mountain?”

Sasuke’s eyes bled red, he stated, “These aren’t Leaf shinobi—they’re masking their presence with a genjutsu. It’s some type of white cloak.”

“Their presence? Not their chakra?”

Sasuke nodded.

“We have to wait for orders,” Sakura reminded them, as much as her fingers itched to run over, she knew her top priority was the hospital, “Masking your presence is forbidden technique. Remember that mission in Rain?”

Naruto snapped her gaze towards her, “Sakura-chan we _need_ to—”

“Naruto,” Sakura tried to reason with him, but her voice was harsh, “If you want to apply for ANBU you have to follow protocol and that means letting ANBU handle it until we get further instructions.”

Sasuke’s lips thinned as Naruto’s chakra fluctuated.

With Tsunade’s face sliding off the mountain, onto the forest floor, the earth shaking beneath her feet and shinobi of all ages appearing on the rooftops beside her, her mouth moved before her brain could catch up, “This was an act of war.”

.

.

.


	2. of shogi pieces

.

.

.

Sakura couldn’t decide if she was lucky or unlucky.

It was cold in the Hokage’s office. Humidity clawing at the windows, smog thick in the air and only the brisk blast of air from the circulation system hummed inside the walls of the tower, but even the coldness of the air could not calm the hot, hum of chakra that filtered throughout the space.

According to the Tsunade, there were no reports of casualties or injuries, she placed her chin over interlocked fingers and spoke, “I suppose we are all kinds of fortunate. We have safely secured the perimeter of the village, Intelligence tells me that this was a rogue group, unknown to Konoha.”

“A terror attack?” Gemna inquired with a senbon stuck between the crook of his teeth.

“So it seems,” The Hokage glanced to the left and asked, “What do you think, Nara?”

Shikamaru inhaled quietly, the furrow in his brow never left and he replied somewhat on edge, “It looks like the same group from the reports.”

Sakura turned to look at her master and she frowned, “What group, shishou?”

Tsunade sighed, her left hand rummaged into a nearby cabinet underneath her desk, she pulled out a series of scrolls, red dye and black rimmed. Unsealing one, she tossed the scroll to her apprentice and explained, “I have been receiving reports of an unknown group terrorizing villages—I’m sure you heard of the kidnapping incident in Lightning not too long ago,” she made a note to look before continuing, “They seem to hail from the same group.”

“The cloaks are different colors,” Sakura stated as her eyes scanned the contents of the scroll, “Different members then?”

“It could also be a decoy,” Shikamaru pointed out.

“Or to throw us off altogether,” She pursed her lips.

Tsunade nodded, “That’s exactly what I was thinking.”

Generally speaking, recon missions were never exactly concrete without some type of evidence—despite the technology boom in the last few years (in Iron mostly), most of the records are from the word of mouth.

“The group was able to mask their presence with genjutsu,” Sasuke interjected pridefully, “But not their chakra.”

The Hokage stared at him, “Explain.”

“It’s hard to explain,” Naruto tried, he scratched the back of his neck, “It’s like you have your chakra and then you have your presence. You can always mask your chakra so it seems like you’re not there, but you still have your presence so you’re still living.”

Sakura tilted her head, she understood Naruto’s logic even though it’s sort of incomplete, she tried to refine it a little and added in her two cents, “It’s kind of like a civilian. Civilians don’t have chakra, but you can still feel their presence. This group can erase their presence and leave behind a chakra signature—it’s kind of like the opposite of what a civilian is.”

“The sharingan disrupted the genjutsu, but I wasn’t able to identify any of the attackers due to my location,” Sasuke pressed his lips together and then finished, “We saw something like this in Rain a while ago.”

Tsunade’s eyes sharpened.

“They’re leaving a chakra trail on purpose,” Shikamaru concluded.

“They _want_ you to track them,” Sakura’s eyebrows rose with disbelief, “But isn’t that reckless?”

Tsunade stared at her apprentice almost as if she were agreeing, but she didn’t want to put her words to power just yet, so she asked instead, “What do you think, Uchiha?”

Sasuke looked mildly surprised that she was asking him, he opened his mouth and was immediately cut off, “I—”

“Not you,” The Hokage huffed, she turned her head to the ANBU to her left side, “The other one,” she motioned, “At ease.”

Itachi – much to Sasuke’s annoyance – spoke first after unmasking, “This group wants to claim responsibility. They want Konoha to legitimize them as a threat.”

“That is out of question,” She replied immediately and then she scowled. In the back of her mind, she realized that this was all political. Recognizing whatever this group was, would not only deem them worthy enough to be a _threat_ – worthy enough for their attention – but worthy enough to be deemed a threat to the _world._

It wasn’t a power play, like Sakura had originally thought. Villages often receive demands like these from various rogue groups, outcasts, exiles and sometimes even cult groups. When countries ignore such factions, they often disappear, and are not to be heard from again, but then again – she glanced out the window to half a demolished mountain – no group had _this_ type of power.

There was a knock at the door.

It was Kakashi, “Permission to enter?”

“Granted,” Tsunade answered, once the masked-shinobi entered the room, she motioned for the elder Uchiha to seal off the room, Kakashi’s mission was sensitive enough, “Report.”

Kakashi whirled his head around, a faint amusement melded into his tone, “Must be important if everyone is here.”

“Hatake,” Tsunade’s voice was silver.

“Hokage-sama,” Kakashi snapped his attention to the Hokage immediately, “I’ve spoken to my contact. They are an unknown organization, they believe to have roughly ten members. Each member hails from a different village. Aside from the obvious assassinations, theft, and robbery — there was nothing _important_ enough to be called for a dire matter,” His eyes flickered over to the mountain outside the high window, “Until tonight.”

“Does your,” Tsunade paused, clearing your throat, “Contact know anything else?”

Kakashi hummed, “More or less. He believes that they are planning something.”

“Bigger than destroying half the Hokage mountain?” Gemna remarked with raised brows.

If this wasn’t a call for attention, Sakura didn’t know what was. Itachi seemed to follow Sakura’s line of thought before he spoke, “I assume, the neighboring countries have sent hunter-nin out.”

Kakashi nodded, “They want Konoha to respond.”

The Jounins in the room did not have a high enough security clearance to know who exactly was Kakashi’s contact – with the exception to Kakashi of course – but Sakura can’t help but feel that there was something strange going on, because why _now?_

* * *

“Don’t you think it’s weird that Baa-chan doesn’t want to fight back?” Naruto asked, his chopsticks poking at his grilled fish.

It was morning now, bright sunlight filtering over the open-shop south of the academy. It was obvious that no one had slept, but time waits for no one. It was almost warm, the beginnings of fall creeping just barely and the wind were more of a cold wash if anything.

“No,” Sakura replied, she picked up a rolled omelet and chewed carefully, “There’s something else going on.”

“Whattya mean?” He frowned.

“Tsunade-sama has ANBU trackers and sensors working on the chakra signatures,” She explained, the saltiness of the egg made her mouth twist and she sipped her tea before finishing her sentence, “I don’t think she wants to rush blindly into this.”

“But Konoha doesn’t need to be seen as weak, Sakura-chan! Don’t you think if we wait too long that something bad will happen?” Naruto ripped a piece of a fish and shoved it into his mouth, “It was a miracle no one got hurt in the bombing! Seriously who the _hell_ bombs the Hokage mountain?”

Sakura stared at him, “You’ve given this a lot of thought, haven’t you?”

“Naruto?” Sasuke interjected and took a seat on the opposite edge of the table, “Thinking? Really?”

“You’re late,” She chided, “I’ve barely gotten Naruto into eating normal food.”

“Shut up, bastard,” Naruto sulked, “I’m sure Kakashi-sensei could tell us—if we could _find_ him.”

Sasuke would’ve rolled his eyes if he didn’t have such a headache, instead, he poured himself some tea and ordered his meal by the meantime, he said, “The police force has been patrolling the entire village since last night; ANBU has been dispatched.”

“All of them?” The blonde squawked.

Sakura’s fingers itched to slap him right across the back of his head.

“No, idiot,” Sasuke answered blankly, “Just my brother and whoever else he requested.”

“It’s getting bad, isn’t it?” Sakura stated almost absently and she sipped her soup.

Sasuke looked at her oddly, he drawled, “What are you talking about?”

“Do you remember the last time we had this much patrol and dispatch ninja out?” She asked, her voice hot like lava, she grabbed a rice ball and munched on it, “Orochimaru was here.”

Naruto stiffened.

“That’s right,” Sakura said sternly, “Tsunade-sama doesn’t want this escalate, which is exactly why she is waiting for more information and more reports. She doesn’t want war. She wants to contain it.”

Sasuke looked at Naruto.

Sakura knew what her teacher was doing, it was the same tactic the shogun used in Iron. He waited to see the enemy’s next move, once he saw through their plan, the shogun gave his orders and eventually decapitated the threat. The Hokage didn’t want to go to war without having a plan in action, lives should not be lost for the sake of haste.

“Haruno Sakura,” An ANBU appeared to her left, adjacent to the metal post of the shop, he presented her a scroll and disappeared.

She glanced at the puff of smoke suspiciously before turning her attention to the scroll, unraveling the rice paper, she read the contents and her chakra spiked high enough for Naruto and Sasuke to jump out of their seats.

Naruto, ever so cautious, looked at her with clear, blue eyes, he asked quietly, “Sakura-chan?”

Her lips thinned, “Summons to the Hokage Tower. The Kazekage has been kidnapped.”

And it hasn’t even been twenty-four hours.

.

.

.


	3. to take the lead

Sakura’s molars crunched her soldier pill into a thousand tiny shards, the black aftertaste of malt made her throat seize, almost as if she were going to cough, but she swallowed the bitterness with her own saliva, and the tongue-twisting essence almost made her forget her ire. Almost.

It had come as a surprise when Tsunade summoned Team seven to the Hokage tower and ordered Sakura to take point for the mission. Team leader. Her jaw almost dropped, but she stared at the hefty scroll in her hands and felt gratitude to her former master because she _believed_ in her.

Of course, Naruto had to open his mouth, bitterness and jealousy and evident in his tone, “But why _her_?”

Yes.

_Why her?_

But Sakura didn’t believe it was necessary to open her mouth to address such question that was so obvious in answer. It still stung, because this was _Naruto_ and she would’ve at least like to think that he understood; it was evident that he didn’t. So she ignored him, but Kakashi-sensei had explained that the Kankuro’s brother was poisoned.

“Oh, that’s why.”

_That’s why._

Because she was just a _medic._

Sakura had shouldered enough bullshit in the years that’s been alive, but Naruto really put the knife in that one. It’s what he didn’t say that has always bothered her, she had always craved praise—acceptance, sometimes it didn’t have to be verbal, and she hated herself for growing bitter because it was a weak emotion. It demanded attention, it demanded appeasement, demanded constant care and approval.

Receiving acknowledgment was practically non-existent with them — he should’ve just said that she would’ve never make it up to their level.

It might have hurt less.

Even _Sasuke_ knew that they were in the wrong and that was ironic in its own self.

“Stop,” Sakura came to halt on a tree branch, her fingers twitched and she picked up a taste of chakra from the west. “Three thousand feet west, three nin en route.”

“Orders, captain?” Kakashi asked lightly.

Sakura knew that he was teasing her, but part of her believed that he was mocking her. It was dark, that thought, her self-worth shouldn’t reflect how she was perceived to just these three imbeciles, but sometimes that’s just how things were.

“Sasuke,” She started, “Give me an estimation.”

Sasuke moved forward, his eyes bled red, he replied, “Half an hour away, and their chakra seems to be chunin to jounin level.”

“We’re going to double our speed,” Sakura ordered, green eyes following the light of shadow, “We can’t afford to intercept, we’re only of couple hours away from Wind country,” she raised her chakra level just a few notches, “We have to preserve our chakra.”

And then she moved.

She knew Naruto wanted in on the action, just as he wanted Tsunade to send him out in the field to hunt down this group, it was not only childish of him, but it was selfish too, because not everyone had an endless supply of chakra—he wasn’t worked to the bone like she was and she really _hated_ herself for thinking like this.

Sakura rolled her shoulders.

Kankuro was her first priority.

It took two hours to reach the Land of Wind, checkpoint was hectic, shinobi were running around and there were only two nin at border patrol and it was _chaos._ One of the diplomats escorted her and her team to the hospital—top floor.

“Sakura,” Temari sighed in relief when she saw the Leaf shinobi, “Thank the gods, I’m glad Tsunade took me seriously when I said to send her _best_.”

Sakura squashed the urge to smile, instead, she handed her the scroll and gave her a gentle look, “Tell me everything.”

And she did.

Temari told her about the fight, the poison, the symptoms, the strange bird, the bombs – to which she narrowed her eyes at – and the way her brother fought for his life.

“I need some hot water, in a tub preferably,” Sakura gave her orders to the scrambling medics, “You make this,” she handed him a piece of paper, “I need three hours and then I want a list of every herb in this country.”

Temari watched silently as Sakura took control of the room and how her teammates did nothing but watch from the outside, and the blonde couldn’t help but feel slightly empathetic to the pink-haired medic.

Because she knew it wasn’t easy holding her ground with legends.

Sakura’s brain was half-working on the math equations of each chemical compound and the dosage, the other half was trying to figure how she would be able to stop the poison from completely decomposing his liver. The irony lay in the poison itself. Toxin breaking down the liver, when it should be the liver that breaks down the toxin.

“He’s stable,” Sakura announced after a while, she pulled the last bits of poison and then she smiled at Temari, “He’s going to be fine.”

Temari exhaled and slid against the wall.

“I need a lab or greenhouse,” She started again, crossing her arms she continued, “I extracted most of the poison, but I still need to make an antidote to prevent any decomposing or scarring of the organs and eliminate the last of the poison.”

Temari breathed slowly, “Our labs and greenhouses were destroyed during the kidnapping—they were in the hospitals and on the outskirts, but we do have a greenhouse in the Kage compound. I can lead you there.”

“Very well,” Sakura turned to look at her team and she narrowed her eyes, “No one is leaving the village until I have made an antidote. Understood?”

She waited until she received three very faint nods.

Good.

Sakura inhaled, at least they listened.

Twelve hours passed and the sun was sliding over the zenith. Bitter sunlight, made her eyes wince and her bones creak, but at least the worse was over.

“Slowly Kankuro,” Sakura chided as she helped him drink the bitter liquid, “You’re going have to take it easy. That poison did a lot of muscle damage.”

“I can’t believe you almost died,” Naruto stated bluntly.

Kankuro scowled, fingers crunching into fists, and he snapped, “I didn’t ask to be poisoned!”

Exhaling, she took a seat and asked, “Tell us what happened.”

It was quite a tale to be honest, though Naruto did interject every then and now about techniques, Sasuke made at least two comments while Kakashi watched the scene with much scrutiny. “—ged to get this,” Kankuro pulled out a piece of cloth from his puppet’s hand, a small piece of black fabric with a red cloud, he said proudly, smugly, “How’s that for almost dying?”

* * *

A ten-hour nap, five rice balls in and a plate of gyoza did Sakura manage to feel somewhat human. Her eyes hurt from squinting into a microscope for so long, but she finally managed to get some rest while Kakashi’s nin-dogs did some scouting.

“Tea?” Temari asked.

She nodded.

It was jasmine she realized faintly, the floral sweetness rolling in the back of her throat, almost made her sigh, she was still waiting. After sending her report to Tsunade, she was waiting for further instructions and or information.

“Thank you for saving my brother, Sakura,” Temari bowed her head humbly, “Really.”

Sakura blinked and then she stood up straighter, “Please, you don’t need to thank me. I was just doing my job.”

“A job that no other medic here could do,” Temari replied bitterly and then she shook her head, “Still I am grateful. I just have…Gaara to worry about.”

The medical shinobi pursed her lips, she replied honestly, “Gaara is too stubborn to die, but I think you knew that already.”

There was a ghost of a smile, she sipped her tea, “It’s a sibling thing.”

This time, Sakura really did smile.

An hour later, Naruto came running in with Sasuke in tow, he waved his hands, “Kakashi-sensei picked up a trail!”

“Where?” Her voice was sharp.

“North,” Sasuke answered, onyx orbs fading to slate, “Ishi Village.”

“Earth country?” Temari frowned.

“On the border of Earth and Ishi,” He clarified.

They haven’t reached far, she mused, “Where’s sensei?”

“Alerting Ibiki-san,” Naruto replied, “We need to leave as soon—”

“We are not leaving until we get orders, Naruto,” Sakura said firmly, she placed her cup on the table, “We need to know where we stand before we enter, for all we know it could be a trap.”

“Sakura-chan,” Naruto’s voice had taken a serious note and it made her uncomfortable without how stern he sounded, “We _need_ to leave, now. Gaara could be dying and we can’t leave our comrade out—”

“Naruto,” She inhaled, trying to get a grip on her temper before she says something that she knows she will regret in the future, “No. We wait for the order. This is not just about saving your friend, this is an international incident, and if you act recklessly—people other than Gaara can die.”

Naruto flinched.

“One of the reasons that Tsunade made me captain for this mission is because I’m a diplomat,” Sakura stated, bluntly, almost as if her voice were made of silver, “I know how these things work. Our mission was to save Kankuro and Gaara is our secondary object. Until I get the okay with the Hokage then we can move,” she tried to soften her voice, but it was still drenched with disappointment, “I know you want to save Gaara, but this isn’t about you Naruto, this can get bad really— _really_ fast.”

Sasuke stared at her as if she were a different person.

But Naruto and Sasuke were not conscious when she had to fight for her life, their life in the Forest of Death. They didn’t see things that she had to see, it was killed or be killed. They weren’t there when Team Seven had disbanded. Kakashi with Sasuke and Naruto with Jiraiya. Sometimes she hated the way she saw things, it made her bitter and pessimistic. She didn’t want to be like that, but she was pushed into such a position—where resentment and harsh thoughts started to pile up, like lava before it spewed ash.

If they kept pushing her, she didn’t know how far she’d make it until she breaks.

 


	4. dark of your room

Everything fucking _hurt._ Sakura felt like she’d been _mauled._ A thousand. It had to be over a thousand goddam puppets she destroyed and the stab wound felt like it was on fire. After this mission, she was getting fucking _hammered._

The day after Chiyo’s death, Gaara came around, walking throughout his compound, almost in awe that he was actually _back._ After the week they’ve had, it was unfortunate enough that Konoha _had_ to deem the Akatsuki as a threat. She walked around the compound too, trying to get her muscles to work, and heal whatever aches she had. Despite the retrieval of the Kazekage, Sakura had yet to debrief her team on what the _hell_ had happened.

She, the only shinobi to kill an Akatsuki member and live to tell the tale.

If she wasn’t in the bingo books, she was _now._

But that was what Kakashi had said when she told him, his visible eye widened and then he ruffled her hair the same way her father would do when she did something well.

It was a good feeling.

Sakura was in some type of room, it was made of oak, warm oak flooring, and furniture. Some sort of study she assumed, there were books, tons and tons of books cluttering the shelves and an atlas. It looked ancient, something a grandfather would own.

Something caught the light of the sun and silver glinted over the fireplace.

A katana.

“Wow,” Sakura breathed, it was a pretty katana. Thin, sharp and double hilted, the rubber of the handle was smoky, almost as if it were charcoal and silver writing lined the side. It was like it was calling out to her, she had a similar feeling like this before—with her chakra gloves.

“It says _Ikigai_ ,” A new voice interrupted her thoughts.

Sakura snapped her had back, she blinked a few times before melding her expression into one of calmness, bowing she winced, “Kazekage-sama.”

Damn stab wound.

“Gaara and at ease,” He corrected, he walked closer to her and helped her sit down, “Naruto has been looking for you.”

She huffed, “He can never take a break.”

Gaara and her relationship was first-name basis, serving as a diplomat and medical officer between villages means that she had to report to him and the Hokage. They were on friendly terms, yes, but they weren’t on _Naruto’s_ definition of friendly terms.

“He is certainly eager,” He added in absently, he pulled out the katana from the mantle, “It was a gift to my grandfather. The previous shogun gave it to him after my grandfather saved his brother from a war prison.”

It was quite a long history, the Kazekage line that is, complicated as it could get. The Land of Iron was a neutral country, they preferred to keep to themselves—isolation really, and they didn’t have shinobi. They had _samurai_ and samurai katanas were the best of the best.

“It’s really pretty,” Sakura commented vaguely, the blade was gorgeous, sharp and clean.

“Keep it,” Gaara said suddenly, sheathing the katana back into its holster and tossing it to her.

Sakura barely caught it – because what the _hell_? – her fingers grasped the leather clumsily, she yelped, “What? Kaze—I can’t keep this.”

Gaara snorted, “Don’t be ridiculous. Accept it as a gift,” he looked over at the katana in her glove-less hands with sureness and his voice grew quiet, “For saving my brother’s life.”

She wanted to fight with him on this, but it there was something in the way he said his last sentence, a soft tone, and a lilt of warmth. Gaara did not give her the katana just because she was looking at it, he gave it to her because she _deserved_ it—because she saved his brother and saved him — because he was grateful and it was a gift from the leader of Suna.

_To strengthen relations between two countries that were once on the precipice of destruction._

Sakura exhaled and wondered what the shogun would say.

The next following days were slow. Healing took time, her chakra reserves were nearly full by noon, even in her unconscious state, her body seemed to heal at a slow, but steady rate and when morning came her chakra was full up to three-quarters.

 “Sakura-chan,” Naruto started off slowly, “Is that a katana?”

“Yep,” She paused, mid-dango bite, “The Kazekage gave it to me.”

“But why?” He frowned, “You’re scary enough with your fists, why add a weapon?”

“To be even scarier,” Sakura scowled, she finished her snack and sipped her tea, “I have basic training with my katana, but I’ve been thinking, I should only use my chakra if I have to—not all of us have an unlimited chakra source.”

Kakashi chided her, “Sakura-chan.”

She shrugged, but she wouldn’t apologize.

“I’d be better off with the sword,” Sasuke stated, almost as if he were about to demand her to give it to him.

She stared at him almost disinterested if she weren’t exhausted, she was sure her temper would’ve come out to play, but when she replied her voice was cool, “It’s unfortunate that the Kazekage finds you…unworthy.”

And she found pleasure in watching him scowl.

Sasuke had everything handed to him, he didn’t have to struggle to get where she was and him demanding things just because he had a higher skill set because he was from a _clan_ made her want to break his teeth. It was demeaning, but most of all it was just plain _wrong._

* * *

 

On the way back to Konoha, the team decided to stop in a civilian village, mostly because they needed supplies and a place to sleep as well. Sakura had shamelessly pulled out the injury card and forced the trio to check into an inn while she browsed around in the market. Truth be told, she was really looking for a library or a bookstore.

She wasn’t lying when she said she had basic training with a katana. She was barely a novice with it, she knew more offensive strategies then she knew defensive, hell, she didn’t even know how to funnel _chakra_ through the blade. She sighed, fingers curling over her medic pouch on instinct – an unconscious habit born of insecurity – it was silly, but sometimes she felt like someone could take away her skills if given the chance, and in this case, her supplies.

There was this one place she saw on the corner of a teashop. A bookstore, though it had more novels and Kakashi’s favorite type of literature, she found a crook in between the history and autobiography section. It looked like an old scroll, she assumed an antique, but it was katana theory rather than an actual jutsu or instruction manual. It was a small bookstore, almost as if it were made for tiny people, small shelves, narrow hallways and drawers that were tucked in each corner against the artificial lighting.

Sakura knew her limitations, of course, she worked better with her head than she did with her hands.

Working with her head wasn’t going to save her life if she could match her mental abilities with her physical ones. Her finger ran over the gilded metal of the scroll, she wrinkled her nose, and unraveled it slowly.

_Within the equation of Kiko’s Theorem, kenjutsu is funneled through a blade, a medium that interacts with both the external release of chakra and internal release, chakra is—_

“Did you find what you were looking for, Miss?” The shopkeeper interrupted her skimming of said scroll, green eyes flickered over to a kindly old man.

Sakura had learned Kiko’s Theorem in the academy, she had spoken to Shikamaru about the theorem a while ago, having the basics down about funneling chakra through a medium was simple in theory, but to execute it—that was the problem. Despite having perfect chakra control, she never actually had a blade to attempt it—Shikamaru had provided a basepoint for her, though she would have to pick his brain a bit more, because she was sure there were holes in the theory.

And if she knew Shikamaru, she damn well _knew_ that he would love to prove the textbooks wrong.

“Ah, yes,” She smiled hesitantly, “I would like to purchase this.”

* * *

 

To enter Konoha from the northwest, shinobi and civilians would have to pass through Kusagakure. It was nearing nightfall and even if no one told her, Kakashi was uncomfortable with this country, which is why he asked if he could take the lead – he followed protocol – and she felt like a bitch when she said _no_. As much as she would love to speed home, she had to take into account the other shinobi that were following her a half a day journey behind her.

The injured and the sick.

“I can’t wait to go home,” Naruto groaned, he threw himself into his sleeping bag and wiggled around like a worm.

“Don’t we all?” Sakura sighed, she pulled herself closer to the fire, she mumbled more to herself than to anyone else, “I really want some dango.”

Solider pills and dried food were only good for so many days, her mouth had forgotten what real food tasted like. Her stab wound was almost healed, but because the blade was poisoned, there would always be a mark. The pinkness of the scab hooked onto her shirt, tugging it with every sharp twist and move of her torso.

“You look like you got stabbed,” Sasuke commented, he raised an eyebrow at her discomfort when she leaned to the right of the log.

“That’s because I did,” She rolled her eyes and rolled her hips so the weight of her torso shifted to her core, the pressure easing.

“What?” Naruto sat up abruptly, hair disarray and eyes wide.

“Yeah,” She breathed, fingers brushing the sides of her knees she looked over at him, “It’s healed and all, but it’ll be a while before the scab turns into skin. I could speed up the process of cell regeneration, but it’s a waste of chakra.”

“After we split up with,” Sasuke said slowly, flickering his eyes over to Naruto, “And went after Deidara, you disappeared into the cave with Chiyo—we didn’t see you until the end.”

Sakura nodded and raised a brow, “Are you sure you don’t want to wait for the official report? I’m sure there’s a lot of details missing.”

“Deidara – the guy who bombed the mountain – disappeared,” Naruto grumbled, he looked over to his pink-haired teammate, “Did that creepy guy do that to you?”

“Actually,” Sakura’s lips curled, “He was very pretty.”

Kakashi made a sound—a sound that she could not identify nor understand, but it sounded like something like a cough. Sakura rolled her eyes, but he was _pretty._ Like a doll, which made sense because he _was_ a puppet, he kind of reminded her of Orochimaru a little—that search for immortality, but it was kind of different. Different like, Sasori would willing to become something else, Orochimaru wanted to live, but he did not want to go through the same measures Sasori was willing to go to—he wanted the easy way out.

“After Chiyo and I killed him,” Sakura started off nonplussed, “He told me that he has a spy working with Orochimaru.”

Sasuke’s voice struck her as odd, “You killed an Akatsuki member?”

“Yes,” She confirmed, a finger tugged on the chain hanging around her neck, the ring dangling just nearing hear knuckle, “I don’t understand _why_ Sasori has a spy working with Orochimaru, but I guess we’ll find out soon enough.”

Naruto stared at her, that ring around her neck was a trophy, and part of him wanted to believe that it was a _lie._ That she _didn’t_ kill Sasori, but it was evident enough that she did. The blonde never understood the word _useless_ before, but seeing how Sakura sat near the fire with eyes greener than grass and chakra rippling like waves—it made him feel _unworthy._

He was supposed to _protect_ Sakura.

That’s how it was supposed to be and he was sure Sasuke understood that which is why the Uchiha hasn’t said anything yet, but even so, it still stung, because Sakura-chan really didn’t need their help anymore.

Sakura felt something shift in the atmosphere, Naruto was uncharacteristically quiet when she glanced up, his blue eyes were cobalt and he stared at the fire in almost exasperation. Sasuke was no better because there was no way to describe their physical state, more so their emotions and maybe that was what was keeping her on edge. Sometimes she didn’t know what to say to them, she was becoming more and more bitter now that she thought of it, and she was getting careless when she spoke. Part of her wanted to hurt them—to _deliberately_ hurt them and that made her sick to her stomach.

Kakashi wasn’t even paying attention, his head nose-deep in his book.

She glanced back to the small stream just a few hundred feet away, she grabbed her canteen, stood up and announced, “I’m going to get some more water.”

She didn’t bother to see if they acknowledged her words, because really, what more were they going to say?

The stream was not very big, an arm’s length at most, but it ran along the border of Grass country into Wind. Sakura did fill up her canteen, but what she _really_ left the campsite was to open up her scroll and try out a move. Her fingers were itching to play with her new katana. She took out her scroll from her back pouch, unraveled it and angled it so the moon was her only source of light.

_—chakra is both spiritual and physical. Chakra channeled through the blade is both flexible and inflexible. Flexibility is derived from the nature of your chakra, fire chakra, for example, means that it cuts hotter, faster and stronger, but it is also harder to control. Whereas if you have water-based chakra, you can manipulate the stages of water, from ice, to liquid, to wind and plasma, but we will touch on plasma later. It is inflexible because channeling chakra through a blade is limited. There are basic stances and basic moves, your speed and agility will determine on how well you can adapt and manipulate your environment to suit your needs._

Funneling chakra was a lot harder than it looked, she grimaced.

Sakura unsheathed her katana, her weight shifted and she swore almost violently. She kept forgetting about her damn _stab_ wound, she would have to limit her movements. She would have to use her five-style taijutsu, Tsunade had developed this type of taijutsu when she was injured during the war and was more of the basics than everything—it was enough though. The core of five-style taijutsu was based on shifting your chakra to your core and extending your chakra to your arms.

Keeping your core tight and limbs lithe allowed you to move easily, but the hard part of five-style is that you weren’t allowed to move—walk or run. You have five spaces, five in front of you, five to the left, five to the right, and five to the back. That was all the movement you were allowed.

Sakura grasped her katana firmly, with both hands and shifted her weight to the right. She used the weight of the blade to lead her and sliced the air with ease. It wasn’t executed correctly because there was some excess weight on her right foot and it left her lopsided.

_Think of your chakra as water, your drenching your blade and water—coating the metal with water._

Sakura summoned chakra to her hands, she used her gloves as a conductor and coated the blade. Her chakra, to her surprise, was _white_. Her chakra was usually green or blue, but never white. She lifted the katana to her lips and then swiped downwards at one hundred and eighty-degree angle and to her shock, the grass beneath her feet disappeared. It was almost as if it were singed, but there was just dirt beneath her feet and there were no signs of grass. Just the earth.

And she stiffened when she felt a surge chakra flicker through the trees at an alarming speed, shoving her katana back into her holster, she shifted her stance to one of defense—she didn’t know if it was luck or not, but the holder of such tremendous chakra was not one of malicious intent.

There were a few other nin behind this shinobi that was speeding through the forest, but they felt like they were walking compared to this nin who was just _flying._ Sakura’s foot shifted backward and her eyes narrowed, but it didn’t even really matter her position because she couldn’t _see_ him, for his moves were like the wind itself.

The only way she did see him was when he collided into her and she yelped at the re-opening of her wound. He was warm, blood roaring and the hard planes of his chest were an uncomfortable feeling against her breasts—with him shoved so hard against her, it felt he was bruising her.

Sakura’s head did hurt when it slammed onto the grass, but the weariness in her bones hurt more. She shifted her chakra into a coil and she was just about to slam her fist into his face when she caught the red eyes of the sharingan.

His sharingan bled into a soft charcoal, with backdrops of soot and he blinked long lashes.

He was so pretty that it _hurt_ , but seriously, it really did hurt because she was having trouble breathing. Literally.

“Can you,” She gritted her teeth, embarrassment a hairsbreadth away from appearing on her face, “Get off?”

“Oh,” His voice was kind and svelte, unlike any Uchiha she had ever _met_ , his said softly, “I’m sorry.”

Sakura blinked.

He even _apologized._

Uchiha men did _not_ apologize, maybe she slammed her head against the ground harder than she thought, he lifted himself off of her and she hissed when the skin of her injury broke. She was going to have use chakra for this.

“You’re hurt,” He stated quietly, eyes widening fractionally, he helped her sit up and pulled out a bundle of bandages from his back pouch.

Green orbs stared at him in mute disbelief, she shook her head rapidly, she lifted her hand up, and muttered, “Don’t worry about it.”

The Uchiha looked at her with concern and firm disapproval, he remained patient, however, “Miss, please let me—”

Sakura rolled her eyes, activated her medical chakra, swiped her hand over her wound and raised a brow, “Really, I’m fine Uchiha-san.”

He watched the wound close up with surprise and his mouth parted, “You’re a medic?”

“Are you sure you’re an Uchiha?” She asked curiously because he was acting kind of strange.

But then he smiled and the way the air caught in her chest—it _hurt._

His hair was messy, boyishly so and his eyes were kind. There was a certain warmth he had to him, it radiated in comfort and he sat next to her without a care in the world. He was fast, that she knew, but it was like he didn’t _care._ His chakra reserves were as impressive as Sasuke’s but it felt different. He _felt_ different. He laughed too and it was a little too much for her poor brain, “I’m not like others, then?”

“No,” She replied immediately, she grabbed her canteen and rinsed the blood off her wound, “Absolutely not.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment then,” He smiled again, but this time he handed her a washcloth to clean the blood properly, “But you don’t look familiar—have you met a lot of Uchiha clansmen before?”

“More than I would like,” She mumbled, she cleaned the rest of the blood and paused when she was about to give the cloth back. Her nose wrinkled, she wouldn’t give back his washcloth with her blood on it. Shoving the washcloth into her pouch, she turned to look at him, “Did the Hokage send for you? The rest of the squads are a half a day behind us.”

“Actually—”

“Sakura, we felt a surge of chakra. Was there an—” Sasuke paused, his eyes widened in disbelief as he took in the sight of the nin and it was like a punch to his gut, “Shisui?”


	5. beyond the grave

Sasuke felt like he had been stabbed. For a dead man, Shisui looked very much alive. Shisui Uchiha committed suicide almost fifteen years ago and Itachi had taken his death with a toll. Obsidian orbs stared at the older Uchiha with something akin to shock, it coiled loosely in his stomach and it felt like he swallowed cold tea.

And Shisui _smiled_ when he greeted his younger cousin, “Sasuke-chan! I haven’t seen you in a while.”

“Shisui,” Sasuke’s throat was dry, he was sure he croaked, “What are you—how are you—” he wanted to scratch his brain with a senbon, he choked, “You’re _alive_?!”

Shisui wasn’t sure if he was amused or if he felt guilty. Maybe it was a little of both. He stood up and gave the pink-haired medic a hand. She looked at him strangely, but she took it nevertheless. If Sasuke knew him, he couldn’t be _all_ that bad, right?

Shisui helped her up to her feet, he didn’t know what possessed him to do it – perhaps a sense of deep niggling curiosity and maybe he wanted to irritate his younger cousin; he wasn’t really sure – he pulled her a little more forcefully, until she stumbled onto her feet and her nose squashed itself against his clavicle. Chest to chest, her hair against his chin and he really _loved_ the way she smelled.

Shisui still answered him though, as if he didn’t have his teammate pressed up against him, his voice nonplussed, “I never died, little cousin.”

Sakura, who was trying really hard not yelp, released the elder Uchiha’s hand and shoved herself a few feet back. She muttered something quick and very unlady-like under her breath, she perched her hands on her hips and asked with irritation combing her words, “What is going on?”

Sakura also had to mentally pat herself on the back for staying rational when she really wanted to throttle her teammate and demand his handsy cousin to stay out of her way or she would use him as target practice for her _fists_.

“Stay out of it, Sakura,” Sasuke snapped, his eyes flickered from her form to his older cousin.

 _Forget_ rationality, she was ready to send Sasuke back to Suna— _flying_.

“Uchiha Sasuke,” Shisui’s tone had a black bite to it, his eyes narrowed and his chakra sparked just enough to have Sakura’s hackles raise, “That is _no_ way to talk to a lady. Mikoto-sama did _not_ raise you to act as such. Apologize. _Now_.”

Sakura stared at him dubiously.

_What?_

Sasuke would rather bite off his own tongue than open his mouth and apologize. Still, she was more than thankful to the elder Uchiha, he scolded her teammate, glared at him and pressured him to admit that the younger Uchiha did something _wrong_ – which was ballsy on its own – but Shisui, according to her teammate that is, was Sasuke’s older cousin. 

Sasuke’s mouth opened and then snapped shut. He scowled. His chakra crackled underneath his temper, he cooled his ire and turned to face his only female teammate, his voice was blank and passive, “I am sorry.”

If Sakura wasn’t so shocked, her jaw might have fallen off, because _Uchiha Sasuke_ had apologized to her.

She wondered if she was still poisoned.

Shisui clearly was someone important in skill and in the clan to have one of the Uchiha heirs succumb into submission, but the fact that he turned around and winked at her was enough to wipe her mind clean.

She had half a mind to ask Tsunade if she could keep him.

.

.

.

As if Tsunade couldn’t stop smirking, her face may have permanently been kept into a feline grin as soon as she heard Sakura’s report. _Her_ apprentice, her stubborn, little apprentice defeated an S-class criminal and brought back the ring as a _souvenir._ The look on Jiraiya and every shinobi within range of the room – men mostly – looked at her with horrified admiration, and Gods above—retribution was so _sweet._ Her apprentice, who was the leader of her first – she says first because it was her first time leading – S-class mission, not only killed Sasori of the Red Sands but saved the Kazekage’s brother and receive intel on Orochimaru, all the while still retaining diplomatic ties to Suna—!

Tsunade was fucking _proud_.

“You do realize you’re going to be in the Bingo Books now, right Sakura?” Tsunade said, honey-colored orbs twinkling with mirth.

Sakura replied dryly, “So, I’ve gathered.”

“And the Kazekage gave you that katana as a sign of gratitude,” She mused, at the metal holstered at her hip, “From the samurai no less.”

“Wouldn’t that be considered a marriage proposal?” Shizune said slowly, Tonton blinking from her arms.

Sakura paled and Naruto bristled.

Tsunade rolled her eyes, “I doubt Gaara is even ready for marriage, but,” she chuckled, “Keep your eyes open for any marriage proposals, Sakura. A political marriage is an unquestionable alliance.”

Sakura gaped, “Tsunade-sama!”

The Hokage winked.

“Please don’t give her any ideas, Hokage-sama,” Kakashi sighed uncomfortable with the attention the men were giving Sakura in the room, he was only human after all, he had Sasuke and Naruto to deal with. He couldn’t afford to be arrested for manslaughter.

When Tsunade dismissed the remaining nin, only Rookie Nine, and a handful of ANBU remain inside the room. She grabbed a scroll from the underneath of her bottom drawer, she began, “As you all know, the Uchiha clan had wanted to overthrow Konoha, Danzo Shimura’s staging, the framework, the release of the Nine Tails—everything,” she motioned for the ANBU to unmask, “Itachi had been used a double agent for the clan and the Third.”

Sasuke stiffened and Itachi’s lips flattened.

“Itachi was just a child back then,” Tsunade continued, “We didn’t know it was Danzo or his involvement until our second double agent told us. Shisui Uchiha was going to use his sharingan to manipulate the head of the Uchiha clan to prevent the coup, Danzo, however, decided to take matters into his own hand and steal Shisui’s eye. Shisui committed suicide to prevent the Uchiha clan from the coup, but not before, using the Yamanaka clan to record the entire scene with their forbidden jutsu,” she paused to look over at Itachi, “Thus proving and having sufficient evidence that Danzo orchestrated the entire charade. The Uchiha clan dropped their suit. Danzo’s execution allowed to us plant back Shisui’s eye and remove the other…atrocities.”

Sakura stared at her blankly.

“But faking Shisui’s suicide just gave us another opportunity to figure out who _really_ was behind the attack of the Nine-Tails,” Tsunade dropped that piece of information a little too casually if Kakashi had to be honest.

Itachi stiffened this time.

“Shisui was Kakashi’s contact for roughly fifteen years. As a _non-affiliated_ shinobi for Konoha – a spy – Shisui was undercover deep enough to gather enough intel,” Tsunade tilted her head to Sakura, “Pertaining this organization that you all encountered within this mission,” then she smiled, “As of today, Uchiha Shisui will be reinstated as a Konoha shinobi, rank, and status effective immediately.”

“Thanks, Hokage-sama,” Shisui’s voice emerged suddenly, he smiled sheepishly as he appeared in front of the back window, “Though the speech was a little too much.”

Tsunade rolled her eyes, “Get in here, kid.”

Itachi couldn’t seem to grasp what was in front of him, his eyes widened and for the first time, he felt something like hope bubble in his chest. He felt foolish, of course, Shisui was alive—they never found his _body._ He swallowed, “Shisui.”

Shisui blinked, he turned to look at him oddly, almost as if he couldn’t recognize him and then his eyes twinkled with warmth, he laughed and threw his arm over his shoulder, “Wow Itachi, you’re almost as tall as me.”

“You are only five years older.”

“I’m still older.”

Sakura stared at the man—the Uchiha who just laughed and threw his arm around _Itachi_. Itachi who was probably the stiffest Uchiha she ever met – excluding Fugaku of course – like they were best friends and they probably were best friends, because Itachi was smiling with his eyes.

“Shisui,” Kakashi tried to break up the light atmosphere by asking, “What is it that you uncovered?”

Shisui blinked, straightened up and then looked at the handful of shinobi in the room. His eyes trailed over to Sakura and stayed on her for more than few seconds. His eyes were coal, warmth with—something, even the curve his lips seemed to tilt upwards, and then he flickered them to Sasuke.

“The group that you encountered goes by the name of _Akatsuki_ ,” Shisui explained, “They are like a terrorist group if you will. A group of world-class criminals. I have only identified three of the members,” he then flickered his eyes over to Sakura, “One of which is named Deidara, he’s blonde makes bombs out of clay. The other person is the one _Sakura—_ ” her name rolled off in a softer tone, almost like silk, and she knew she wasn’t the only one that heard it—even Kakashi stiffened, “killed. A puppet master from Suna himself, he excels in poison and medicine.”

She nodded.

“—the other is a man named Kisame. One of the members from the _Seven Ninja Swordsman of the Mist_.”

Sakura glanced at Sasuke and Naruto.

But Shisui caught the entire movement and then he asked, “You know of them, Sasuke-chan?”

Sasuke twitched at the nickname and answered, “Team Seven’s…first mission encountered one of the swordsmen. Zabuza,” He flickered his eyes over to Naruto, “A year later we encountered Raiga.”

“When you say _encountered_ …” Shikamaru interjected, he was trying to mark down all the latest threats.

“They’re dead,” Sakura said flatly.

Genma's eyebrow raised, “But weren’t you all Genin?”

Naruto huff was enough of an answer.

“Was the person who bombed the Hokage mountain, Deidara?” She asked suddenly, it made sense after all.

“Yes,” Tsunade nodded and then she frowned, “After the kidnapping of the Kazekage and the bombing of the mountain, we have to recognize them as a threat. Especially since the only reasoned they kidnapped the Kazekage was because he was a jinchuriki,” her eyes narrowed, “And managed to extract the Shukaku. This is an international crime.”

Naruto’s eyes widened.

“The elimination of the Akatsuki is our a top priority,” Tsunade stood up, she stood next to her apprentice, “Danzo was not smart enough to come up with the release of the Nine Tails and if he had help—he _must_ be connected with the Akatsuki.”

Shisui nodded, “The Akatsuki is the only organization that is capable of releasing and extracting a tailed beast.”

Tsunade turned to Sakura and spoke, “And we are going to start with Orochimaru.”

.

.

.

Ino flopped onto Sakura’s bed with a dramatic sigh and said, “Uchiha Shisui, huh?”

“He’s kind of strange isn’t he?” Sakura skimmed through her closet, fingers brushing hangers before she huffed in exasperation, “He certainly doesn’t _act_ like an Uchiha.”

“So you _have_ met him.”

The pink-haired nin turned to look at the blonde, she blinked, “Didn’t I tell you?”

The blonde scowled, “No.”

“We were somewhere in Grass, remember you guys were like six hours behind us?” Sakura started off, “We crashed in some forest. Naruto and Sasuke were being stupid as usual, so I said I was going to go fill up my canteen by the stream — how about red?” she pulled out a red dress to show her friend.

Ino wrinkled her nose, “No. Clan events require subdued colors unless you’re the center of attention,” she pointed to softer pastels and jewel tones on either end of her closet, “Let me so those. So what happened?”

“I filled up my canteen obliviously, but I also wanted to try out my new katana. I only know basic forms, the scroll said that I would have to adapt to it and use chakra,” she pulled out a pale yellow sundress, “This one?”

“Too festival-like,” The blonde shook her head, “And then?”

“Then,” Sakura thought about it, “Then I felt his chakra. It was fast, it was faster than Sasuke’s and Itachi-san’s. I’ve never felt speed like that before. I only had a few seconds to put away my katana before he slammed into me.”

Ino looked at her, “What do you mean Shisui-san _slamme_ d into you?”

“Literally,” She huffed, “He opened up my wound and I almost smashed my fist into his chest cavity too, but I didn’t when I saw his sharingan. He offered me bandages when he saw that I was bleeding, he even apologized. He was kind of sweet about it, but in like a firm way and he stopped insisting until he realized I was a medic, ” Sakura paused, “It was different. He wasn’t like overbearing or overly-masculine about it, you know what I mean? He was polite, but he treated me like—like a woman.”

Ino blinked, “What do you mean by a _woman_?”

Sakura grabbed a short, deep blue, silk kimono with silver lining and a white obi. She pressed the kimono against her chest, it would hit just above the knee, she asked, “How about this?”

“I like it,” The blonde paused, “Do you still have the silver sandals I got you?”

“The lace-up ones?”

“Yep.”

“They’re somewhere in my closet,” Sakura frowned and rummaged through, “Anyway, he didn’t treat me like how Naruto or Sasuke or Kakashi-sensei treat me. Like _just_ a medic or their female teammate that just stood in the background or depreciate—” she inhaled frustrated already, “You know how they are,” Sakura grabbed her silver sandals that were hidden in the corner of the closet, “Shisui-san was very kind when he spoke to me, gentle, but in a—I don’t even know how to _describe_ him. He was just very…honorable.”

Ino stared at her and then she gaped, “You _like_ him?”

“Of course I like him,” Sakura snapped and then she chuckled, “Do you know what the best part was?”

“Tell me!”

“Sasuke felt his chakra and came to see what was going on. After today, I realized that he thought Shisui-san was dead and when I asked what was going on—Sasuke got all pissy and asshole-ish,” Sakura rolled her eyes and her lips quirked up, “Shisui-san scolded him and told him to apologize.”

“Sasuke _apologized_?”

Sakura nodded, “I wonder if I can keep him to train Sasuke and Naruto,” then she paused, “Maybe Kakashi-sensei too.”

Ino laughed, “Well this banquet is the perfect opportunity to do so,” then she quirked a brow, “But is it really necessary?”

She shrugged, “The Uchiha clan have their own tradition. Mikoto-sama was kind enough to extend the invitation to me and Naruto. I think it’s nice though, Shisui-san’s been away for almost fifteen years, a celebration to welcome him home seems appropriate.”

“Alright put on the dress and I’ll do your makeup,” Ino commanded, she crossed her arms, “Do you have ice cream?”

“I have mint.”

“Seriously?”

“What? It’s good for your stomach.”

“Sakura, some things should just _stay_ at the hospital,” Ino sighed, she grabbed the makeup brushes on the counter and made magic. A little eyeliner, some blush, and a lip stain, she grumbled, “At least your skin is behaving, you don’t even need powder, and because it’s an event you can’t wear _too_ much. Where’s your mascara?”

“By the desk and be careful with it, I got it from overseas.”

“How fancy.”

“When I need to be, pig.”

“Your hair is going to be in a side part. Grow it out if you want a husband.”

“I actually did like having long hair, you know,” Sakura grimaced, “The chunin exam kind of scarred me.”

“You can’t let one bad experience ruin the others,” Ino chastised, “Think of it this way—since you pummel your teammates on a daily basis: grow your hair and think of it as a training exercise.”

“A training exercise?”

“No one should be close enough to touch your hair,” Ino said firmly, fingers slick with hair cream, “So don’t let them get close. That should be your objective.”

Sakura thought about it for a moment, “Huh. You’re kind of smart, pig.”

Ino felt no remorse when she snagged the back of Sakura’s hair roughly, she blamed the sticky cream, “Shut up, forehead.”

Ten minutes of poking and prodding, Ino finally declared Sakura fit enough to be in the public’s view. Hair tucked into a side part, a waterfall of hair on the right side of her face and the bare skin of her neck made her feel slightly uncomfortable, especially since the kimono was an off-shoulder dress.

Her eyes were the focal part and these earrings that Ino leant her, were two pieces of white opal and they brought the greenness of her eyes – so did the kohl but Ino thought it was the earrings – and her bare clavicle did nothing but emphasize her small stature.

“Can you breathe, forehead?” Ino tied her obi tightly.

“Yes, but if Mikoto-sama made rice-balls I won’t be breathing later.”

“And you call _me_ the pig.”

Slipping on her sandals, she turned to look at Ino, and asked, “Good?”

“If I was Shisui,” Ino started off suggestively, “I’d jump you first chance I got.”

Sakura threw her pillow at her face, she closed the door and said, “I’ll see you later, Kaa-chan!”

Ino’s muffled voice was heard despite the medic leaving the premise, “Don’t mess up your makeup!”

It was a ten-minute walk from her home to the Uchiha compound, which was past farmer’s market and the hospital tower. The compound was tucked neatly into a corner section of Konoha, where the Nara forest ended and the Hokage mountain began.

Sakura stared at the front door of Sasuke’s home with a bit of trepidation. It _sounded_ like a lot of people, but thankfully Naruto appeared next to her in a span of a few seconds.

“You look pretty, Sakura-chan,” Naruto smiled and then frowned, “Aren’t you going to be cold?”

Sakura rolled her eyes, “It’s summer, Naruto.”

“Right.”

She looked at him with an orange button-up and dark blue slacks. At least he wasn’t wearing his jumpsuit, she wrinkled, “You look good too. Maybe less orange next time?”

Naruto sputtered, “What’s wrong with orange?”

“Do you want a list, dobe?” Sasuke asked, he was leaning against the open door.

“Bastard, why didn’t you say you were there?”

“Why are you standing in front of the main entrance?”

“We were going to knock,” Sakura interjected, she brushed the back of her neck with her hand and Sasuke was very aware of her bare skin, and she finished with a glare, “But I was waiting for Naruto.”

“Sasuke why are you—oh, Naruto-kun, Sakura-san,” Itachi’s voice was pleasant compared to Sasuke’s dry tone, he opened the door wider and motioned his younger brother to move, “Please come in, Kaa-san is expecting you.”

Sakura was very aware of the eyes on her and she cursed herself for having pink hair. She probably looked like a fish in a sea of eels. Naruto was at her back, though that didn’t make her feel any better, she wasn’t sure how much etiquette he acquired since he trained with Jiraiya, and she could only hope he held his tongue if one of the Elder’s spoke to him.

But Sakura, she has her limits herself.

“Sasuke did your mom make the rice balls?” Sakura asked seriously.

Sasuke glanced at her, “I saved a tray in the garden.”

Naruto grinned, “Well, you finally did _something_ right.”

“And what the _hell_ —”

“Your parents are coming, hush!” Sakura hissed and then smiled at Mikoto’s kind eyes, “Mikoto-sama, Fugaku-sama thank you for inviting us this evening.”

“Please Sakura-chan,” She smiled, hands tucked in between the sleeves of her kimono, “You two are practically family.”

Naruto beamed.

.

.

.

“Sakura, right?” Shisui’s voice was like a drop of water in a quiet lake, she blinked, mouth full of rice and she turned her head to face the older Uchiha.

Sakura swallowed her rice – she was kind of shocked she didn’t choke – and nodded.

“Mikoto-sama’s rice balls are still a godsend, huh?” He chuckled fondly, he rested his weight on the back of his heels and shoved his hands into pockets.

She seriously hoped there wasn’t any rice stuck to her face or mouth for that matter. Sasuke left the rest of the rice balls to her when she snuck out to the gazebo, there underneath the bench was some Tupperware filled with riceballs, Naruto ate half of the tray, however – she silently glared at the plastic with betrayal – but she managed to eat three-quarters of her section with no one looking.

“Mikoto-sama used to make riceballs for us when we were genin,” Sakura explained, her calf was tucked underneath her thighs as she sat on the bench, the other leg rested against the concrete of the floor, string lights lay limp against the structure and beams of the gazebo. It glittered yellow and his hair seemed more like ash than black, “But now that we’re older, we don’t really get them anymore,” she rolled her eyes, “Sasuke tries to hoard them when there are events and when Itachi-san isn’t available.”

Shisui laughed, “Itachi always did like riceballs, which is why Mikoto-sama didn’t make them for tonight. Itachi did.”

Sakura blinked and then looked down at her lonely riceball.

Sasuke might vomit if she told him.

“Oh,” She didn’t know what to say to that.

Shisui took a seat next to her, it shouldn’t have surprised her, but it did. She was expecting it to be awkward, the atmosphere, she expected it to be uncomfortable, but Shisui took a seat next to her and spoke to her like they were old friends. His voice was sweet, gentle, like a blanket, for her to compare it something, she would have to say it was like honey—it was thick, languid, but slender enough to keep her warm. Sasuke’s voice was heavy and rough, much like his sword work and Itachi’s voice was gentler, like the wind, soothing but sometimes it was harsh enough to cut you.

“How does it feel to be back in the village after so many years?” Sakura asked suddenly, her eyes were emerald.

“It’s hard to say,” If he was surprised by the question, he didn’t show it, he replied and looked a little lost when he watched the compound, “I saw my mom for the first time in years, it was…difficult. She didn’t recognize me the first few hours and I didn’t push her. After dinner, she called my name and it was…” Shisui looked so tired, happy, but tired, “It was _hard._ ”

“I’m sorry,” Sakura said, because she was _sorry_. It was a sacrifice, the life of a shinobi was built on sacrifice and it was hard to be selfless. Sometimes you don’t remember what it was like to be selfish, Sakura never did learn.

Shisui stared at her, “I don’t regret it, Sakura.”

“I know,” She nodded, because she understood he was happy to serve his country and his family, “But I’m still sorry.”

The wind kicked up a bit, one of the string lights almost slapped the medic in the face, her hand tucked it back into the crook of the pillar, then she asked, “Would you like the last rice-ball, Uchiha-san? I’m reluctant to give Sasuke the last piece.”

Shisui laughed and accepted the rice ball, “You must like me a whole lot better than Sasuke-chan if you’re willing to give away your last riceball.”

Sakura rolled her eyes and muttered,  “Sasuke is…spoiled.”

“How did that happen?” Shisui munched on his riceball, his kimono like water on his warm skin, “He’s not the same sweet kid I knew from before.”

Sakura stared at him, “Sasuke? _Sweet?_ ”

“It must be hard for you to understand then, if you’ve never seen him like how I _saw_ him,” He finished his riceball and leaned into the bench, “He was a really good kid when he was younger.”

She raised a brow, “Huh. I’ve seen pictures, but somehow I don’t believe it.”

Shisui smiled and somehow, it made her nervous, “What about you?”

Sakura blinked, not understanding the question, she questioned him, “Me?”

“I’ve heard stories about you since I came back,” Shisui revealed, hair tickling his forehead, he leaned in closer, close enough for her to feel the warmth radiate off his body, “Haruno Sakura, apprentice of the fifth Hokage, second-best medic in the world, only known shinobi to kill an Akatsuki member and live to tell the tale, head medic of Konoha hospital, and riceball lover,” he tilted his head to the side and smiled, “Did I miss anything?”

Sakura then realized, that smile of his, was very, _very_ dangerous.

.

.

.


	6. princess princess

Sakura stared at him for a little more than what deemed appropriate and then she responded, “Female teammate of the infamous Team Seven and student of Hatake Kakashi,”

Shisui waved it off, “Logistics.”

Sakura quirked a brow, “Really? That’s all that I’m known for. Uzumaki Naruto and Uchiha Sasuke’s female teammate.”

He stared at her surprised by the bitterness in her tone, he shuffled closer and Sakura leaned back until her back hit one of the wooden poles. Her calf was numb underneath her thighs, but she ignored the pins and needles sensation and stared at him. He spoke with a certain sharpness that made her tilt, “Naruto and Sasuke-chan are in a league of their own. They have their own expectations to live up to. Naruto’s being the Fourth’s legacy—” Sakura’s eyes sharpened here, but he continued nevertheless, “—And Sasuke-chan’s with Itachi,” his finger tapped her nose, “You can’t compare yourself to them, it’s not fair to yourself.”

Sakura suddenly hated how _rational_ Shisui was.

She narrowed her eyebrows, “Don’t patronize me, Uchiha-san. I’ve worked very hard to get where I am and my teammates – as stupid as they are – they need to,” she struggled, “They need to—”

“Shisui,” He corrected her, “It’s not a sin to desire acknowledgment Sakura, it makes you human and you’re right it’s not fair for your team to depreciate you like that. I’ve only seen Sasuke-chan act like that, I would hate to see the rest of your team do that to you,” he shook his head, “But you need to stop comparing yourself to them, it will hurt you more.”

“Uchiha-san—”

“Shisui,” He corrected again and then _looked_ at her, “Sakura.”

Sakura’s eyebrow twitched, “Shisui- _san_ , even if that were true, I’m still not cut out for ANBU because I’m just a _medic_. Medics, despite them being highly wanted in ANBU have their—”

“—own set of protocol, I remember,” Shisui nodded, “You’re an offensive medic. All you have to do is pick up more ninjutsu or another skill, then you should be able to apply for ANBU.”

“I _can’t_.”

He frowned, “Why not?”

Sakura blinked. Yes. Why not? She couldn’t because she didn’t have a teacher, Tsunade deemed her unteachable since she learned everything she could from her, Kakashi would never take her seriously and that was all she had. She took her time answering, “Sensei doesn’t really instruct us—me. He teaches mostly Naruto and Sasuke, it’s one of the reasons why I decided to spend more time at the hospital instead of with them,” she frowned, “They only see me as a medic.”

“What about that katana?” Shisui asked, his fingers touched the bottom of his sleeves.

“I just recently received the katana,” Sakura explained, allowing her elbow to rest against the rail of the gazebo, she rested her cheek against her palm, “I only have basic training with kenjutsu.”

“But you were using ninjutsu with the katana when I saw you,” He pointed out.

“I was reading from a scroll,” She didn’t know why she felt embarrassed, then she shrugged, “I do better with theory than application,” she also didn’t know why she felt the need to clarify, “I’m more of a paper ninja.”

“You can only learn so much from a textbook,” Shisui shook his head, “You need a teacher.”

“I guess,” Sakura said dubiously, she was half-surprised when he didn’t offer to find one for her, with the way his body language was talking, she or any female, would assume that he was going to give her a proposition, but he didn’t.

Sakura couldn’t figure out why she was disappointed.

.

.

.

The days drifted by slowly, Sakura’s attention was divided in between the hospital and time at home with her scroll or training. She didn’t see Shisui again, she assumed that he was on assignment, or something of that nature because she didn’t see Sasuke or Naruto either.

One day, she decided to use a different training field – she looked at the roster – fifteen was open. Training grounds fifteen was set up quite differently, there were logs and a stream on either side of the field, not a tree in sight—which was strange.

Sakura unraveled the scroll and read her annotated notes. Unsheathing her katana, she allowed the blade to touch the ground and then swiped upwards. It was a standard defensive position, next she summoned chakra to her fingertips – part of her wondered if she could use her blade as an extension for a chakra scalpel – it was just a theory obviously, and then swung it sideways. The sting of chakra singed the grass, it blackened towards the river and steamed the water.

“But, I didn’t _use_ a fire jutsu,” Sakura said aloud in shock at her own blue chakra, the harder the swing, the hotter the burn, even though she didn’t use a fire jutsu, when chakra and the air itself rub against each other, it created friction and the blow was hot enough to burn through the grass.

Logistics weren’t going to help her here, she needed to figure out how to swing her blade faster, fast enough that an Uchiha wouldn’t be able to _see_ it. She re-routed her chakra, this time she tried to visualize it like a blade, and her blade colored itself ocean—then she _swung_. It wasn’t wind chakra, but the way she slashed the air forced the air in between the training ground and the river, cut the tree-tops that were at least a thousand yards away from the training ground in _half._

Sakura’s eyes widened.

She _really_ needed a teacher.

Her control with her katana wasn’t _great_ , she was used to her fists, using her body as a weapon, which was why her long-range combat was atrocious. If, if she was able to switch from her fists to her blade, it would help level out her abilities and she just wanted to be a little more than what she was.

“You can’t approach kenjutsu the same way you approach medical ninjutsu,” Shisui’s voice interrupted her thinking, he flickered in front of her, he thought about it and then grinned, “Or maybe you can.”

—

Shisui couldn’t help but be disappointed in the way Sasuke was, in what he became, he supposed he had Itachi to blame for that, but Itachi could only do so much and the older Uchiha couldn’t fault him for that. Sasuke was, in his own way, stubborn, and perhaps he had gotten that from his uncle, but he was also still stuck in his angst-teenager- _I-hate-the-world_ phase and it kind of grated his nerves.

Kakashi was a little more than disappointing, he would’ve thought, after fifteen years, he would’ve gotten rid of his martyr and ignorant ideals, but to purposefully neglect his student in favor of his two _gifted_ students?

Was he shocked, yes, but was he surprised?

No.

Shisui felt for the pink-haired medic and he couldn’t fault her for growing bitter, but if she kept going in the direction that she was heading—she would find herself in a position where there was _no way_ out.

He had seen power hungry, he had seen ambition, he had seen the fracturing of minds from young shinobi driven by their own ideals and morals, but he hadn’t seen neglect from their own kin and Shisui knew from years of experience, that _neglect_ led to an even more terrifying consequence.

Shisui wouldn’t admit it – not out loud anyway – but Sakura, in her own way, made him think of himself. He saw the loyalty in her, he saw discipline, but most of all, he saw _compassion_ , and compassion was a rare trait. It was stereotypical to think of medics as the only shinobi that should have compassion, just because they were _medics_ , because shinobi were still humans and he’s spent enough time pondering the line between being a shinobi and being a _monster._

But Sakura had more than just compassion, she had something a lot more ruthless swimming inside her, and Shisui knew that bitterness because he had a taste of it himself.

So he gave her a test.

It was a rather simple test.

But it was _hard._

It _would_ be hard for her, for the same reason that it was hard for people who were associated with clans, Sakura had her own battles, most of which would come from her and her alone, but Shisui lived through war and there were some things you had to let go before it ate you alive.

And Sakura’s battle was _hard,_ because she had two powerhouses for teammates, if she didn’t understand what he was hinting at, she would be swallowed by their shadow.

“Chakra control is required for all types of kenjutsu, but it’s not necessarily important because of the blade itself,” Sakura replied, she was somewhat surprised by his presence, “If I can use my katana as an extension of myself then—” she paused mid-way and then her lips thinned. The point of her learning kenjutsu was to balance out her fighting style, because she needed to learn long-range fighting, despite the fact that her katana is used for close-combat, combining that with elemental ninjutsu would make that fighting style long-range, therefore—

“—kura. Sakura!” Shisui’s face was a little too close for comfort, he looked at her with concern, but made no move to touch her.

She blinked and shoved him a few footsteps backward, “Personal space, Uchiha-san.”

“ _Shisui_ ,” He pressed and smiled, “Now what are you talking about? An extension?”

“I was thinking of extending my chakra as a medical scalpel to the blade,” Sakura explained, she rested the tip of her katana on the ground for a moment, “But it wouldn’t any sense, because a blade would cut the skin and my scalpel would disable nerves, flesh, muscle, blood, and bone. That’s internal damage, blades are used for external damage.”

Shisui stared at her with something akin to horror.

Sakura covered her mouth to hide a laugh, but it was strange to see someone who hailed from a clan that didn’t display emotions so willingly—demonstrate his shock. Still a small chuckle left her mouth.

Shisui’s lips twitched when he heard her tiny titter, “You’ve thought about this a lot, hm?”

“I work more with theory—”

“—than with application,” He continued for her, “I remember,” he looked at her again and then deliberately pointed towards his weapon, “I prefer using a tanto, but I can use a katana if I need to.”

Sakura flickered her eyes to his shoulder, where the handle of tanto lay and then back to him—almost as if she were considering something.

But Shisui was patient.

He was _waiting._

“Would you mind,” Sakura struggled and she struggled to complete her sentence, she didn’t even look at him, part of her was afraid of rejection and she would probably always be afraid of rejection because her team had given her a lot more grief than acceptance and that made her doubt herself, “Teaching me how to use a katana, sometime?”

And Shisui _smiled._

Sakura felt something inside her stomach knot up, like rope, hard and rough, but then it melted into something like mud because it made her throat seize up, because she didn’t know—she doesn’t _know._

“All you had to do was ask, Sakura,” He laughed a little, the edges of his voice warmer, softer, but it was still masculine at the same time.

_Pride._

Shisui wanted Sakura wanted to swallow her pride and _ask_ for help.

He knew that she had grown confident in her abilities as the Hokage’s apprentice – from which he heard from Itachi, after all, Itachi gave him a run-down on what conspired during his hiatus – but she was becoming angry and she needed to recognize herself first, her talents second.

Isolation was a punishment, not a gift.

“Of course I can teach you, but first let’s get some food. I haven’t had _Kyoto’s_ tempura in years!” Sakura was baffled when he swung an arm around her shoulders, he was careful maneuvering her out of the field, part of her felt awkward because she didn’t _know_ Shisui that well, but Shisui had no problem at all with physical contact.

“Hey, is it okay if I touch you?” Shisui paused mid-speech, more than anything, he didn’t want to make her uncomfortable, maybe a little because he liked seeing her annoyed, but not to the point where she would feel nervous.

It took Sakura a couple of minutes to realize that Shisui was asking for her _consent._

Never, in her twenty years of life, had anyone ever ask for her _consent_ , Naruto touched her without warning, Kakashi ruffled her hair without thinking and Sasuke sometimes grabbed when she was in danger, but that was different because she _grew_ up with them—at least it’s different to her.

Shisui, who only met her maybe a week ago, asked her, not as a teammate, not as a sensei, not as a friend, but as a _man._

Sakura felt light-headed with this much awareness. She looked at him with confusion, but his touch wasn’t unwelcome, because it was _comforting_ – she nearly choked at her own realization – and even though she really didn’t _know_ the older Uchiha, she felt much more comfortable in his presence than she did with her _team._ Not knowing how to respond, she did what she did best, she normalized, “It’s fine. You’re going to have to touch me sometime if you’re going to be teaching me.”

Shisui stared at her with a certain intensity that made her hands itch and then he said with disapproval, “You _know_ that is not what I meant.”

Sakura felt almost scolded and huffed, “It’s fine,” then she added in after, “Just don’t be weird.”

He preferred that line better because he breathed a chuckle.

“Ah, Sakura-chan!” Kyoko, the owner of _Kyoto’s_ , greeted her when she entered the outside shop. She blinked blue eyes, looked up at the arm that was connected to her shoulder, and then she smiled rather mischievously, “A date, Sakura-chan?”

Sakura stared at her for a minute and before she could reply, Shisui opened his mouth.

“Of course,” He replied cheerfully, he ignored the medic’s gape and continued, “Her teammates have been hogging her too much, I decided to kidnap her—”

“Ignore him Kyoko-san,” She brought her hand up to his mouth.

She giggled nonetheless, “Would you like the usual, then?”

“Yes,” Sakura nodded and dragged the muffled Uchiha to a table near the corner of the room. In the back of her mind, she noticed that only until she took a seat, then he would sit as well. It wasn’t a remarkable action, but it was unexpected and she realized with a small sense of sadness, that she never really was treated like _this._ This, being something she didn’t know how to explain or act.

Shisui took her grimace for irritation and laughed, “Lighten up, Sakura,” he removed the holster from his back and placed it to the side, “Come here, often?”

Sakura rolled her eyes, “I like tempura. My idiot teammates prefer to live off ramen,” she placed her hand under her chin, “I can only drink so much sodium.”

“ _Ichiraku_ is a Konoha staple,” He reminded her, “But I realize that eating ramen repeatedly can get—”

“Boring.” They finished in unison.

Shisui smiled at her chuckle, then he prompted, “This can be our spot, then.”

She looked at him quizzically and repeated in question, “Our spot?”

“After training or before training or anything really,” Shisui clarified, he accepted the pot of tea that came and poured her a cup, “We can come here to talk and eat, without your team or my very annoying cousin.”

Sakura’s heart twisted at the sentiment, as soon as she took a sip of his tea, he did too, she inquired with surprise, “Sasuke bothers you?”

“Not Sasuke,” He replied, then he paused, “Well maybe Sasuke-chan too, he’s gotten a bit more broody since he was a baby. I was talking about Itachi.”

Sakura’s mouth parted, “Itachi-san? How does he bother you?”

“Same thing really, training or eating,” Shisui listed, “Sometimes we go to clan events and other times he wants me to go on missions with him,” Then he sighed, “The kid really needs to get some friends.”

She tried not to smile, but the twitching of her lips just made matters worse, “Why do you call him kid, if you’re only five years older?”

His eyes glittered, “Because it’s fun to mess with him,” he sipped his tea again, “Is this jasmine?”

“Yeah,” Sakura confirmed, “Green tea isn’t very healthy in the middle of the day because of the caffeine. I usually opt for jasmine or white tea.”

“You’re not one of those health nuts, are you?”

Sakura glared at him, “We’re in a _tempura_ shop.”

“Point taken,” Shisui laughed, “I like tempura too, but they make really good gyoza here,” he turned to refill her cup and his, “We can try those next time.”

“They have yakitori too and I think udon,” She wrinkled her nose, “Udon kind of reminds me or ramen now.”

He spoke with a knowing-edge, “ _Kyoto’s_ is a lot more diverse than a ramen shop.”

“Obviously,” She scoffed, “I mean—”

Sakura’s voice came to a screeching halt, when Shisui grabbed her hands and looked at her with a lot more warmth than she’s used to. She didn’t know if she was uncomfortable or anxious, but it was probably the latter, because his thumb rubbed over her knuckles almost affectionately.

“Here’s your order, Sakura-chan!” Kyoko arrived with shrimp and vegetable tempura, two bowls of miso soup, steamed pork buns, edamame, and ebi rolls. Her eyes sparkled when she glanced at their joined hands, “I’ll be back with some more tea.”

“You did that on purpose,” Sakura accused with a flush and untangled her fingers, “What did I tell you about being weird.”

“ _Kyoto’s_ gives a discount to couples,” Shisui smiled again and she was getting real _tired_ of that smile. “And this is a lot of food for one person considering you’re a regular.”

She glared at him, “Are you calling me _fat_?”

He blinked and then swallowed nervously, “Of course not! How could you—”

“What do you mean discount?” She sighed deciding that this really wasn’t _worth_ the trouble and snatched a shrimp from his chopsticks.

Shisui gaped when she stole his shrimp, he almost pouted, and answered her after eating an ebi roll, “ _Kyoto’s_ has a discount for couples, I think it’s fifty percent off for any couple who eats here.”

Sakura stared at him. Fifty percent off? Does he _know_ how much tempura she could eat? Before she could even think of that possibility, she asked him suspiciously, “How do I know you’re not lying?”

“It’s called the OTP discount,” Shisui replied, “That’s what they call the discount here, though I’m not sure what it means.”

Sakura blanched, her previous fangirl days were coming to bite her in the ass because she actually knew what that meant and she just hoped that Shisui didn’t pick up on it—

“Oh?” He made a sound of interest, onyx eyes sparkling with mischief, “So you _know_ what it means.”

She could’ve groaned; she couldn’t catch a _break._

Sakura didn’t reply, she continued to stuff her mouth with tempura and hoped to ignore his pointed gaze, but when he persisted to staring, she lost her temper, “What? How _old_ are you? Twelve?”

“I’m actually twenty-nine, almost thirty,” Shisui answered evenly and then he grinned, “If you were curious, all you had to do was ask.”

“I might actually hit you,” She scowled.

He laughed rather loudly and she hated herself because she liked the way the sound warmed her bones. He placed his hands into a defensive position and stole a shrimp, “Okay, okay. Anyway, tell me about your abilities. Medical ninjutsu, taijutsu—all of it.”

Sakura sipped her soup and then summarized, “As you know I am Tsunade-sama’s apprentice, so I have enhanced strength, medical ninjutsu – I’m not being arrogant here, but I am considered one of the best because Tsunade-sama is my mentor – my taijutsu is good enough for me to go toe to toe with the Mangekyo sharingan, but my stamina is lacking and I have a summoning contract. I’m a genjutsu type, but I’ve never had much training in that area and I don’t know any elemental ninjutsu despite having two affinities, which are water and earth. My Yin seal is also almost complete and my chakra control is the ninety-ninth percentile.”

Shisui’s eyebrows rose, “Ninety-ninth percentile, huh?”

“It’s the only thing I really pride myself in,” Sakura retorted and swallowed a piece of tofu, “Besides my medical ninjutsu, that’s different.”

“Why is it different?”

“Medics are,” She paused, “Considered a subpar shinobi. At least now. There’s a sort of power play with the classifications, which is why Tsunade-sama’s how she is. She could break every single bone in your body and then put it back together,” she smiled at that thought, “I respect her for that, but she’s also a Senju and they’re in a class of their own.”

Shisui’s raw evaluation of Sakura was much different than he originally assumed. Sakura did know her limits, she knew what she lacked and she knew what she was good in, but she didn’t know how to proceed from there, but she had a faint idea of what. She was a planning type of shinobi, a tactician. Her close combat training was ideal, so was her medical abilities, and she had enough pride to show for that, she was confident in her abilities, but she had a right to be and maybe he misjudged her, because he could hear the _uncertainty_ in her voice.

Shisui didn’t know what she was like when she was a Genin and frankly, he didn’t really care, all he knew was that she was self-made and she had enough determination to go forward.

“Medics are probably one of the best kinds of shinobi out there,” Shisui stated finishing his soup, “They give life and they can take it,” he blinked, “I retract that statement, they’re kind of frightening.”

Sakura appreciated his effort, but sometimes the word _scary_ made her feel slightly unfeminine and how she hated hypocrisy. Taking an ebi roll she chewed, “That’s basically the run-down of my abilities.”

He pondered for a moment, “My affinities are lightning, fi, e and wind. The ninjutsu part we’re going to have to start from scratch, which is not a bad a thing, it will take longer, but genjutsu and taijutsu is something we can work with,” he sipped his tea and then finished, “The kenjutsu will be slowly incorporated, it’s not as important as taijutsu—you need to solidify your basics first. Kenjutsu will come naturally after that.”

“How are you going to teach me taijutsu?” She asked curiously.

Shisui smiled secretly, “That’s a surprise.”

“I don’t like surprises,” Sakura grumbled, looking more and more grumpy as Shisui’s teeth _sparkled._

“You’ll like this one,” He laughed, he accepted the bill that Kyoko came with and paid with the twitch of his fingers.

She blinked, “Wait—did you? Already? You didn’t have to pay for me.”

“Kaa-chan always said a gentleman always pays on the first date,” Shisui hummed and winked.

Sakura could have gasped if she wasn’t so shocked.

“Hold on to this one Sakura-chan,” Kyoko giggled and handed him the receipt, “I like him.”

When she left, Sakura snatched the receipt and really did gasp, “There really _is_ a discount.”

“Told you,” He threw his arm around her shoulder, “I say we get the gyoza next time.”

“And more shrimp tempura,” She nodded more to herself, as they walked out of the shop, “An OTP discount huh, wait till Ino hears about _that_.”

“What does OTP stand for anyway?” Shisui asked curiously.

Sakura bit the inside of her cheek and tried to look anywhere else but at him. She could feel herself flush in mortification and ignored him. She wouldn’t answer him—she would _not._

Shisui was a little surprised at her embarrassment, “Sakura?”

She glared at a faraway lamppost, shifting her attention to the poor metal light-baring technology, but then she felt the arm disappear and his presence too, then he reappeared in front of her and she almost ran into his chest. She looked up – her mistake – with incredulity.

“Tell me,” Shisui was more than curious, he looked at her with soft, warm coal-colored orbs and pleaded pleasantly, “Please, Sakura.”

Sakura’s brain had stopped working for approximately ten seconds before she stomped on his foot and wanted to scream when he didn’t even _flinch._

_He’s a masochist._

“Sakura,” His voice was deeper, warmer and _oh my god_ she _hated_ him. Her stomach was twisting and she was flustered and—and there were certain things she did _not_ know how to deal with! Men and Sasuke’s cousin – she slapped herself mentally – since when were they in the same _category_?

“Alright!” She caved with humiliation and swiped her face in an attempt to relax, “Just stop being so _annoying._ ”

Shisui huffed and waited.

“It means one true pairing. It’s a couple that balances each other perfectly and they’re like a favorite to a group of people.” Sakura sighed more frustrated than embarrassed, “It’s an equivalent to a soulmate.”

He stared at her blankly.

Sakura waited for the laughing and the disgust, but there was nothing.

Then…

Shisui sighed so melodramatically – Sakura was so stupefied that she actually snorted – and crooned, “To be a teenage girl.”

Sakura punched him in the shoulder.

.

.

.


	7. with your brightness

Shisui, Sakura began to think wryly, was something else.

He was very friendly, social, but he was quiet at times, especially around people he didn't know and he used his friends or family as a crutch to socialize with other people. He spoke with a warm tone – like the gentle heat of a fire – perhaps it was an Uchiha thing, to have that type of lithe, but she couldn't really put her finger on it—he was so  _different_.

And it wasn't just because he was an Uchiha – though it might be, she wasn't  _too_ sure – it was because he was different than any other man she's ever  _met._ It was dangerous territory she was venturing off to, she knew this because to separate Uchiha Shisui from a shinobi, a  _friend_ to the facet of a  _man_ —she needed to stop this train of thought.  _Right now._

"Welcome to my training grounds," Shisui introduced her to a forest, a forest that looked  _vaguely_  familiar, a forest that looked like—

"Are we in the  _Nara Forest_?" Sakura asked with disbelief, this wasn't  _his_ training grounds and she doesn't think they were even  _allowed_ to be in the forest. The area was secluded, preserved for only Nara clansmen and members of said clan, occasionally for events were outsiders ever invited, but that was it.

"Hey," He frowned at her incredulity, "I'll have you know, I own a couple of acres of the Nara forest."

She looked at him suspiciously, narrowing her eyes, she inquired, "What do you mean you  _own_?"

"Shikaku-senpai let me purchase some land a while back," Shisui shrugged, he took out his holster and placed it on a nearby rock, "The clan's compound is about a half-hour walk from here anyway, so it's not like I'm secluded or anything."

"But why buy land here?" Sakura frowned, "There are plenty of pieces, cheaper too I'm sure near the northern district."

"True, but I've always liked nature," He answered, he grabbed her hand and dragged her deeper into the brush. The foliage was green, very green and lush. The forest looked healthy, and there were very few deer this far out, but it's kind of peaceful.

Shisui's hand was warm, his fingers calloused from kenjutsu, and it was nice. He felt  _nice._ Shisui took her deeper into the forest where it got so unbearably thick that she thought she was inhaling pine and sunlight, there were trees that were strategically cleared, producing a pathway, then it cleared, like light at the end of the tunnel. He stopped abruptly and said, "Look."

The ocean.

Sakura had no idea how Shisui managed to swindle Shikaku-sama into purchasing land this close to the sea, but she wasn't complaining. Instead of a cliff, like most of the terrain at the borders, the trees faded until it became clear that sand was at her feet and the ocean was  _blue._

So blue. Like there were tiny pieces of sapphire threading the waves and salt, glittering like pieces of silver and it smelled so  _clean._

"If you look close enough, you can see Kiri," Shisui pointed out, there was a faint piece of land miles and miles out at sea.

"I don't have eyes like you, Uchiha-san," Sakura rolled her eyes, but still, she couldn't help her smile.

He laughed at that and then paused abruptly. Frowning at her with dark eyes, he reminded her, " _Shisui,_ Sakura."

"Shisui-san."

Shisui sighed, "Stubborn."

"Of course," She agreed with him but did not move otherwise.

"I'm building a house here," Shisui revealed and grabbed her hand to lead her back to the forest, "It's close enough to the ocean, but a few minutes' walk back to the house. It's peaceful."

"I would hope it's peaceful," She raised a brow, "You're near the  _ocean_."

Shisui chuckled, "Well there's that too, I always liked the smell of water."

"You can smell water?" Sakura stared at him funnily, then she paused, looked at him and asked him in shock, "You're building a house? You're not staying the compound?"

"No to the first question, yes to the second, and no to the third," He answered, he tilted his head, "Well to the first question, rain always smells slightly sweeter than ocean-water, I think because it soaks into the trees and flowers, and oceans are just salty, but they are distinct—"

"You're rambling," Sakura pointed out with mild surprise, "Why aren't you living in the compound? After the compound's  _feast,_ I thought that…" she trailed off not knowing how to continue.

"The compound is," Shisui sighed, his hand tightened around her's and then it relaxed, "It's suffocating and it's tiring. I don't like it, I've never liked it. I only go to visit my mother and Mikoto-sama, and Sasuke-chan of course. Sometimes, Fugaku-sama, but mostly Itachi."

"The clan just allowed you to leave?" She inquired dubiously.

"Not without some fight," He shook his head, "But how are they going to fight me? After all, I've been dead for fifteen years," his lips quirked, "At least not literally. Are they going to condemn a dead man?"

"That's a morbid question," Sakura replied slowly, her fingers wiggled under his grip, but she made no move to untangle her digits, she kind of liked the weight of his hand. "So you're just going to live out here like a hermit?"

"A hermit," Shisui scoffed, the sunlight made his hair look like red-speckled milkweed, "What if I get married?"

"And drive your spouse crazy this far out?" She tried not to laugh.

"I'm sure our kids we'll fill up space."

"You want kids?"

He looked at her, "Don't you?"

Sakura refused to be flustered at that question, instead, she focused on the markings of the rocks and grass. And more dirt. "Well, yeah. Maybe later, but not now."

"How many you want?"

Green eyes widened, "Isn't that a little personal?"

He rolled his eyes, "Humor me."

"I don't know," She lied, "I never really thought about it."

Shisui stared at her blankly.

"Okay maybe I've thought about it," She rolled her eyes and they came back to their field, "I was thinking two or three, I don't really know."

"I want four or five or six," He offered immediately, "But no more than seven."

Sakura stared at him incredulously, "I bet you even have their names picked out."

"I do."

She couldn't stop her laugh, "Of course you do."

"But," He released her hand to grab his tanto from his holster, "Obviously my wife and I'll have to talk about it. What if she has a brother and his name is on my list? I don't want to name my kid after her brother—" He shuddered, "Too much family drama."

"And I'm sure you've had enough of that to last for a lifetime," Sakura huffed.

Shisui chuckled bitterly, "I'm glad you have me figured out, Sakura."

"I don't," She admitted, green eyes flickered to him and then back to her gloves, "But I will."

And it was the difference between warmth and heat. Warmth, curling and comforting, soaking into her like sunshine, and it purred like a cat, all teasing and soft, but there was heat. Heat hot enough to scorch, hot enough to burn, hot enough to have your hands covering your mouth because you just can't  _breathe._

Shisui's smile was like that.

—

Sakura was panting because holy  _shit,_ Shisui was  _fast._ He was so fast that her brain had troubling perceiving his movements, because he was  _here_ and then he was  _there._ He was substituting his presence with dust rather than smoke like most people do, but Sakura's trained with Sasuke and Kakashi-sensei – though not as much as she would like – so she could keep up, but barely.

Because Shisui didn't know what personal space was, she knew what he smelt like, he smelt like fire and rain, he had the briefest hints of sandalwood, funneling chakra through her nasal pathways, she forced her brain to lock onto sandalwood – which was probably not the best idea because they were in a  _forest,_ but she doubted that sandalwood grew here – he also smelt like the ocean and that wasn't helpful at  _all._

Somehow, it worked, because her kunai clanged against his and she pushed him back into the trees. His back slammed into a trunk and she nearly breathed in relief because  _finally_ , and then he wasn't there at all.

"Not bad," Shisui's voice was at her ear, a kunai to the neck and his hand in her pocket.

"When did you—" She was exasperated and she gave in the urge to stomp her foot like a petulant child. She groaned, "Substitution?"

"A clone actually," He chirped as the crumble beneath his feet, he removed the kunai, but still remained behind her, hand still in the pocket of her skirt. "That wasn't bad. I almost used full speed too."

"Full—?" Sakura half-shrieked, "You were  _holding_  back?"

Shisui suddenly appeared in front of her and smiled kindly, "I don't usually use full-speed when I'm training. Plus I just need to assess how fast you are, going at full speed would be counterintuitive because I don't want to use my chakra unnecessarily. We still have ninjutsu to think about," Then he raised a brow, "Plus, you were holding back too."

Sakura bit out, "If I used my full-strength you'd be swimming in the ocean."

"See?" He poked her cheek, "You're fast enough to be eye to eye with the second level of the sharingan, but you  _could_  be faster."

"How?" She asked slowly and rubbed her cheek.

"I'm going to teach you how to use shunshin," He grinned wickedly.

Sakura stared at him as if he were daft, she crossed her arms and retorted, "But I  _know_ how to use shunshin."

"Not the way I do," Shisui hummed pleasantly.

"That was shunshin?" She said surprised, she thought it was completely different jutsu, but she shouldn't be too surprised, sometimes even the basics of jutsus can be perfected into something entirely different, "It didn't feel like shunshin, it felt like lightning."

"Ah," He looked startled, "That's more of a signature thing, I use a tiny bit of lightning ninjutsu to stun my opponents, I'm surprised you picked up on it."

"I'm sensitive to chakra."

"I remember," Shisui said softly, "But it  _is_  shunshin. I figured it would be easy for you to pick it up, it requires very good chakra control," he nearly laughed at how quickly excitement touched emerald orbs, "But the timing also, you have to cut off chakra at a certain point or you'll be too slow."

"What do I do?" She tilted her head.

"Show me your shunshin," Shisui pointed to the rock in the middle of the field, "Flicker from here," he points to a spot on a tree three hundred feet away, "To there."

It took five seconds and then she appeared. It was standard, but he wanted it down to a blink of an eye, he commented, "It's textbook, you even have smoke."

"Am I not supposed to have smoke?"

"Shunshin is based on the sole purpose of disappearing, so not even a trace is left behind."

"Is it possible to not leave an imprint of chakra," She pondered, "Suppressing your chakra while cutting it off seems to contradict."

"It is," Shisui agreed, "But you have to channel chakra to a secondary pathway rather than the main branch."

Sakura's eyes brightened, it almost made sense, and then she used shunshin. Her chakra was non-existent, but instead of releasing it as she cut the chakra, she managed to shift it to a different pathway and appeared behind him, "Like that?"

_He didn't even feel her._

His eyes widened, "How did you—?"

"There are five chakra pathways," Sakura explained, she lifted a finger, "I shifted my chakra from my main pathway to  _two_ smaller pathways. I shifted my chakra—kind of like water. I suppressed my chakra into the second pathway, then shifted it to the third one to complete the shunshin and then I shifted it back to my main pathway to keep my suppression."

"But you still have the chakra?" Shisui asked slowly.

"Chakra doesn't disappear," She shook her head, "I just transferred it back, energy is always moving, the concept isn't hard, but I had to use a counter-clockwise movement, that way it doesn't knot up in my system."

"Are you telling me used shunshin without using chakra?" He questioned her in incredulity.

"Well I  _did_  use chakra," Sakura scratched the back of her neck, "But it didn't deplete, I just put it back. I tried to mimic your lightning ninjutsu, but instead of physically, I used the same concept to my chakra system, that way—why are you looking at me like that?"

"Again," Shisui demanded.

Sakura used shunshin, fingers forming a tiger seal and then she emerged in front of him. Shisui couldn't feel her chakra, not even when she appeared in front of him – and she was supposed too, because you can only cut chakra so quick – his fingers jabbed her forward and she used shunshin to stand on the rock.

He stated slowly, "You're not cutting your chakra."

Sakura shook her head, "I shifted it instead, that way I don't deplete it."

Shisui really shouldn't be so surprised, after all, her chakra control was in the ninety-ninth percentile, and the last person to have that kind of control over their chakra was the first Hokage. He wanted to scratch his head with a toothpick, she got the theory down to the teeth, but the application was the difficult part.

"Alright," He rubbed his face, "I honestly didn't expect you to pick it up so fast."

Her voice sounded off, "You expected me to do bad?"

"I expected you to shunshin, but I didn't realize how good your chakra suppression was," Shisui admitted, but then he rolled his eyes, and looked at her softly, "I shouldn't be too surprised though, you're pretty amazing."

Sakura's mouth parted at the compliment, eyes blinking slowly she swallowed her flustered state and inhaling deeply she said, "It's not fast enough."

"No, it's not," He agreed and then he grinned, "We're going to get your shunshin down to a blink of an eye."

She blanched not liking the mischief flickering in charcoal orbs, it was times like these, she remembered that he was Sasuke's cousin.

"We're going to play tag."

—

Sakura was bruised, poked and prodded as she wobbled out of the Nara forest with the elder Uchiha whistling behind her. She was exasperated, she managed to fall at least thirty times, he poked her on the side, shoved her on the ground and pressed her against so many trees she was sure that she had splinters on her back, but she felt sort of full.

Shisui was  _rough._

He was rough, he respected her enough to take her seriously and he wasn't without mercy, because every so often he would ask if she was okay and if she wanted to take a break. She liked that he did that. He was very considerate, but he was rough with her because she was a shinobi and knew that she could handle it.

Sakura liked playing rough.

She liked knowing he wouldn't break under her, that she could push him to his limits – or at least try – and that he wasn't adverse to getting messy. Even if she did manage to land a blow on him, he didn't complain and he didn't bitch about it. He took it in stride and kept going.

She  _liked_ that.

"Are you sure you don't need to go to the hospital?"

"Why?" Sakura exhaled, "So they can see how many times you poked me?"

"Itachi's the one with the poking fetish," Shisui huffed and swung an arm around her shoulders, "Not me."

"I wonder where he learned it from," She grumbled under her breath.

"What was that?" He gave her a squeeze, fingers sliding up to her ribs and he took great pleasure in watching her flinch at his fingers. Ever since he realized that she was ticklish from his game of  _tag_ – Sakura had groaned when she understood what  _tag_ meant – he took great lengths to find an opening to jab at her sides.

"Shisui-sa—N!" Sakura squeaked as his fingers dug into her ribcage, she was torn between laughing and sobbing, because she was  _sensitive_.

"I'm sorry I can't  _hear_ you," He hummed, his arm squeezing even tighter, fingers sliding and scraping.

"I'll break your arm, Shisui!" Sakura half-shrieked, half-laughed, she squirmed around his hold and then abruptly, he released her. The sound of her voice traveled throughout the village, civilians watched as the pink-haired medic squealed at the amorous Uchiha suitor – well at least to them – shinobi, on the other hand, were flabbergasted.

"That's right," Shisui laughed, his fingers tangling in pink hair, "It's  _Shisui_."

"You're so annoying," She panted and rubbed her sides gently, "I bet you don't even do this to Sasuke."

"Sasuke-chan's not cute anymore," He reminded her, shoving his hands into his pockets.

Sakura snorted, "So you  _did_ tickle him."

"When he was a toddler," Shisui hummed, "He's sensitive in the weirdest places. Like the back of his ears are super sensitive."

"His ears?" Her eyes sparkled at this new-found information.

"Blackmail looks really attractive on you," Shisui winked, he leaned closer to her and wasn't perturbed by her ignorance.

"I wasn't aware," She sniffed.

"Your witlessness is really cute, Sakura."

"I do my best," Sakura blew, then she winced at the sore spots on the back of her neck, "Just how many times did you poke me?" she took her hand and swiped the back of neck with healing chakra, moving it down her arms and under her shirt, she sighed, "Are you sure you're not a Hyuuga?"

"Cross my heart," He swore with mock-seriousness, "I may have jabbed you with chakra fingers, but that's it."

"Chakra fingers, huh?" She warned him darkly, "You better hope my shunshin doesn't become as fast as yours, or you're going to be tasting my chakra  _fist._ "

"Sexy, Sakura," Shisui deadpanned, he didn't sound the least bit scared and that would have been a blow to her pride, but instead, it made her even more excited.

There was a strangled sound from behind her, she blinked and turned her head to see her teammates staring at her with a very,  _very_ strange look. Then she realized how close she and Shisui were standing, inwardly she sighed, but when she made a move to put some space in between them, Shisui tossed his arm over her shoulders— _again._

"Sasuke-chan," Shisui greeted cheerfully, "Sasuke-chan's teammate."

Naruto choked, blinking rapidly, he lifted a finger and pointed at the two of them, "What are you doing with Sakura-chan, you—you  _Uchiha_!"

Sasuke slapped the back of Naruto's head.

Shisui raised a brow, "Sakura and I were going to get dango."

Sakura blinked, "We were?"

"Well I thought it would be a good idea, I pushed you really hard today," He chuckled sheepishly, giving her a squeeze, he continued, "I know you wanted a turn, but I haven't had that much fun in years."

"A…turn?" The blonde sounded broken.

"Why are you holding her like that, Shisui?" Sasuke demanded, his eyes could hardly believe what he was seeing, Shisui and  _Sakura_ —it was like Itachi cut his  _hair_ or something.

"She smells nice," Shisui said casually.

Sakura gaped, either he was lying or he was telling the truth or he was purposefully antagonizing her idiotic teammates—she paused and cleared her throat, "That's cause you shoved me against the magnolia tree."

"I didn't hear any complaints."

"It's not like I could exactly speak," Sakura rolled her eyes, "You were suffocating me."

Naruto actually  _whimpered._

Sasuke blanched.

She used a hand to cover her mouth and snickered. Her teammates could be a little too overdramatic if she had to be honest, she inhaled and didn't have to look at Shisui to know that he was amused, "Did you guys need something?"

"Sakura-chan you can't date this  _Uchiha_ ," Naruto grabbed her arm and  _yanked_  her towards him. The pinkette yelped at the sudden force, Shisui's fingers jabbed into the crease of the blonde's elbow and dropped his arm to slide against her waist, he rebuked him, "Naruto, don't  _pull_ her like that."

"We were training, you blonde-idiot," Sakura snapped, she winced when she had to use her chakra to heal her dislocated shoulder and she swore quietly at the sting.

"Oh," He frowned, "But  _why_? I thought you trained with Baa-chan."

"I finished my apprenticeship, Naruto," She scowled, "I'm a combat medic, remember?"

"Right," He didn't sound convinced.

"So you roped Shisui into training you?" Sasuke raised a brow, his mouth marring into a frown, "Isn't that a little desperate?"

_Desperate._

Sakura inhaled deeply, her temper and frustration getting the better of her. Shisui's grip on her tightened, but she was tired and she was sad, because these were her  _teammates_ , and she was just  _tired._ Deciding that they  _really_  weren't the trouble, she smoothened her features into a blank expression, then she turned to face Shisui and bowed her thanks, "Thank you for the lesson, Uchiha-san."

And she used shunshin without waiting for a response.

When Shisui turned to face her teammates, his sharingan  _blazed_  hell-red.

.

.

.


	8. just one touch

Sakura stared at her medical textbook with distaste, despite having a rather _eventful_ day of training with Shisui, he still has her touch her katana – which is really weird because she had _asked_ him – taijutsu was his main focus with her, and she supposed she shouldn’t be too confused by that after all, he was an _Uchiha._ But Shisui had made an interesting point with regards to shifting chakra to different pathways, it would be harder for other shinobi if they didn’t have good control over their own chakra, still, it was a tool that she could use to minimize the amount of chakra she needed to use.

Simple things, such as movement, using chakra excessively was a bit redundant, and it’s not like she had a ridiculous amount of chakra – not like Sasuke or Naruto who had a goddamn sea of chakra – she had to preserve what she could. Her teammates they were, she narrowed her eyes, _dense._ They lacked introspection and empathy, thinking with their feelings rather than their head – she would be a hypocrite if she didn’t acknowledge that she also did this – but at least she _chose_ to get angry.

_Desperate._

She wanted to _choke_ Sasuke.

Suddenly, there were three raps at her front door. Furrowing her brows, she tugged on her pale blue robe, her pajamas consisting of a thin tank top and cotton shorts. Stalking towards her door – she already knew it was Sasuke and Naruto from their chakra signatures, but knocking? They don’t knock? – she opened the door and blinked in surprise.

Shisui grinned at her, he looked a little winded, but he stood at the back of her two teammates who had the nerve to look embarrassed. They were bruised and cut, limping and Sasuke – judging from that purple bruise – had a broken jaw.

“What—?” She was stupefied.

“We’re sorry, Sakura-chan,” Naruto apologized quietly, “We didn’t mean to make you feel bad or left out. We just,” he shrugged, “We just wanted you to still need us. We felt useless when you didn’t need us to protect you.”

Shisui nudged the back of Sasuke. _Hard_. The younger Uchiha scowled, his expression smoothening into one that was chastised, he looked at her gently—as gently as Sasuke Uchiha _could_ , “Sorry. I didn’t mean it.”

Sakura blinked, then she turned to look at Shisui with incredulity.

Not really understanding her look of confusion, he nudged Sasuke harder.

“I didn’t mean to make you feel inadequate,” Sasuke’s voice was strangled as he spoke, his voice a little softer when she pressed her lips together, “Because I know how that feels,” she felt her throat clench a little, “Sorry.”

Sakura, could hardly wrap her head around what the hell was going on, just a few hours ago she was about to break something, regardless of how much chakra she used, and then maybe cry a little because—well, those were her _teammates._ But Naruto and Sasuke stood in front of her door _apologizing_ and they _meant_ it. She wasn’t even _breathing_ , for the fear of her own breath might make her miss something in that little speech of theirs. If she didn’t say something now, she might as well pass out from the lack of air. Her voice was rough, “Just—Just, get in here and sit. Let me heal you because I _know_ you won’t go to the hospital.”

Naruto’s eyes brightened as he limped towards her couch and Sasuke followed suit, stopping only once to see if she forgave him.

Sakura turned to look back at Shisui who held two plastic bags in his hand, he smiled, “I brought take-out! I couldn’t get to the tempura place so I hope gyoza and curry is okay.”

She opened her mouth, but no words came out. She accepted the plastic bags and motioned him inside. Placing the bags on the table, she looked over at her teammates who were already bickering, but the air was less tense, almost pleasant, she looked over at Shisui and murmured, “Thank you.”

Shisui blinked.

He wasn’t expecting her to thank him – maybe he was, but it was hard to read Sakura sometimes – she looked a lot sweeter than he was used to, almost bashful and he _really_ wasn’t expecting the nauseating tug on his heartstrings when she smiled at quietly. His fingers twitched and suddenly, he felt overwhelmed.

He shook his head quickly – trying to rid himself of all _gentle_ thoughts, because Sakura was everything but _gentle_ – and threw his arm around her shoulder, again.

“You’re welcome,” Shisui smiled at her kindly, his heart still thudding in his ears.

Sakura had to bite the inside of her cheek to distract herself from the warmness of his eyes. Shrugging herself out of his hold, she walked over to her couch and healed her idiotic teammates, she asked Shisui as she set Naruto’s arm, “Was it necessary to break their bones?”

“They’re very thick-headed, Sakura,” He replied dryly as he opened the boxes of takeout, “Plates?”

“The white cabinet above the sink,” She answered and then laughed, “They’ve always been like this.”

“Can you stop flirting with my cousin in front of me?” Sasuke scowled as she swiped her hand down his jawline.

“Sasuke,” Sakura sighed, “You don’t know what _flirting_ is.”

Shisui snorted and set the table.

“And you do?”

“I’m not answering that.”

“Afraid I’m right?” He smirked.

“I can break your jaw and leave it,” Sakura threatened him, “Do you _want_ to test me?”

Naruto walked towards the kitchen and grabbed the utensils from her drawer. The blonde paused when he caught sight of a red mug from the corner of the dishrack, it had a black heart and smiley face, “Where’d you get this mug, Sakura-chan?”

When Sakura finished with Sasuke’s face, she flickered her eyes up to the red cup, she replied, “A patient gave it to me.”

“It says from _your secret admirer_ ,” He scowled.

Sakura took a seat at her table, quietly surprised when an arm placed a plate full of food in front of her, looking up, she watched Shisui place a pair of chopsticks in front of her and poured her a cup of water.

And it was really, _really_ hard not to smile at him.

So she settled for a hum and picked up a piece of gyoza. Her mouth salivated at the taste of buttery shrimp and lemongrass, “ _Kyoto’s?”_

Shisui looked at her shyly and then winked.

“Sakura-chan,” Naruto pressed, “The cup.”

She rolled her eyes and snatched her cup back, “Naruto, he’s nine. Get over it.”

“Oh.”

“Is chicken curry okay?” Shisui asked and watched her stir the food on her plate, “I wasn’t sure if you liked beef or pork curry. Beef tends to run a little spicy and pork is saltier so—”

“I like chicken curry,” Sakura reassured him, his rambling was kind of cute though, “ _Relax_.”

“I made sure they put extra pumpkin and potatoes,” He smiled, “The sweetness from the Kobacha will make the curry bearable.”

“You sound like you can cook.”

“He can,” Sasuke interjected their somewhat weird banter, his nose wrinkled at that, he took out a plate of food and shoveled a spoonful into his mouth, “His mom and my mom used to cook for most clan events.”

Sakura blinked, “Your mom taught you?”

“More or less,” Shisui laughed sheepishly, he took a seat next to her and scooped up a gyoza. “My mom wasn’t a shinobi, she was an instructor in the hospital, so aside from cooking, the other thing that I learned from her is basic first aid,” he shrugged, “She didn’t like me cleaning though, I broke the stove once.”

She stared, “You _broke_ the stove?”

“Excessive force.”

Sakura tried to muffle her laughter, but she ended up sounding like she was choking. She quickly drank her water and replied, “I broke the oven once and almost burned down sensei’s apartment.”

“Sakura-chan has not been allowed to cook since then,” Naruto said seriously, “Not. At. All.”

Shisui laughed, he turned to look at her with glitter in his eyes, “We make quite a pair, hm?”

Sakura hid her smile beneath her glass.

—

“ANBU, huh?” Sakura wrinkled her nose, her fingers already probing the back of his elbows, testing the strength of his bones. His tattoo flexing when she lifted his arm up.

“Surprised?” Shisui quirked.

“I feel like I should be,” She replied, her hand eased the muscle and then she checked his clavicle, “But I’m kind of not.”

“Have you thought about ANBU?”

“Yes,” Sakura answered, she shifted his bone, pressing the bone into place, “It’s not like I haven’t been on ANBU missions—I have, but they were usually on-call missions and I assume you know what those are like?”

Shisui nodded, “There is a shortage of medics in ANBU.”

“Yeah,” She scribbled something onto his chart and rolled her shoulders, “Now I need to see your sharingan.”

He stared at her for a moment, then blinked, black bleeding into red, and then he said hesitantly, “No one has checked my sharingan before.”

“I would assume so,” Sakura said amusedly, chakra touching his temples, “After all, you’ve been dead for nearly fifteen years. Protocol and medicine don’t stay the same—what _is_ this?”

“What?” He frowned.

“Did you—you _take out_ your eye and _put it_ back in?” She demanded aghast.

“Weren’t you there for the debriefing? I thought you knew this.”

Sakura’s eyebrow twitched and she gritted her teeth, “I didn’t know you—it’s lopsided!”

Shisui stilled, “I put it back in wrong?”

“A _medic_ didn’t put it back in?”

“I didn’t exactly have enough _time_ to—”

She growled, removing her hands from his face she stomped over to the door and yelled out, “Get me some morphine in a drip bag!”

Sakura crossed her arms, turned back to look at him and huffed, “I’m going to set your eye back and you are not _allowed_ to use your sharingan for a whole _week._ If you pull a Kakashi and disappear before your final checkup, I will _remove_ you from the mission roster.”

Shisui deactivated his sharingan and had the _audacity_ to chuckle, “I get it. I thought I over-used my sharingan—half-blind and all that.”

She pinched the bridge of her nose, “ _Shisui_.”

“Yes?”

“Stop being so nonchalant about this—this is reckless!”

He rolled his eyes, his temper leaking beneath his cheerful façade, “I’m not being reckless. I’m a _shinobi_ —”

Sakura suddenly appeared in front of him, leaning over him, she punctuated her sentence with irritation, emerald eyes like ice chips, “Your life is _not_ a game. Stop treating it like one.”

Shisui narrowed his eyes, “Sakura. I’ve been undercover for nearly fifteen years, I can’t help but take my mission seriously. Even if it meant taking on other missions that are not deemed moral or have a high mortality rate. I’m a shinobi—”

“You still don’t get it, do you?” She snapped, her jaw clenched with barely restrained rage, “You’re not undercover anymore. You have Itachi-san, your clan, you have Sasuke and you have your friends here. Stop trying to play the role of goddamn _martyr_ , think of someone other than yourself and don’t think you can use that _shinobi_ excuse with me, you Uchiha!”

His sharingan activated without his consent and his hands gripped her forearms, yanking her closer and before he could retort, “You—”

“—san, I have the morphine, would you like me to—Oh! I’m sorry,” One of the nurses flushed with embarrassment, “I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

Sakura blinked and looked down to see how close she was to Shisui’s face. With him sitting on the cot, her standing in between his legs, his hands around her forearms and her hair brushing his cheeks. She purposefully bit her tongue in an attempt to clear her thoughts and ignore the fact that—that this position was _wildly_ inappropriate.

“Put the IV in,” Sakura said gruffly, she removed his hands from her person and looked for some gauze in one of the cabinets, “Give him half the normal dosage.”

_Too much simplicity._

“I don’t need morphine,” Shisui said flatly.

Sakura didn’t even turn to look at him, “I don’t care.”

Once the IV drip took place, she waited exactly ten minutes before starting the procedure. The nurse said that she could have another bag ready, but the pink-haired medic shook her head and said the procedure wouldn’t take too long. Grabbing a silver bowl, some gauze and some antiseptic, she tossed it onto the small table.

Deciding that it would be better for him to sit up straight while she re-wired his eye, she walked closer and touched the skin around his eyes. She grimaced, “I’m going to start now,” she paused, “It’s going to feel a little weird.”

Shisui didn’t reply, he merely stared at her as her hands began to glow green, her chakra cooled the fried vessels of his eyes, and it felt like a wet pop. Her fingers gauged into his socket and she placed his eyeball into the silver bowl. Quickly, she used the gauze to soak up the extra blood and poured chakra into his empty socket. Sakura tried to heal most of the damaged vessels within the pathway, the nerves wiring up to his brain and then back to his temple. When she placed his eye back in, the world flickered in color.

“Close your eyes.”

Shisui’s lashes fluttered under her hands, her palms tickled underneath and she itched to scratch them. Sakura poured chakra into her fingertips, concentrating on the frayed fibers, like ice she encased them and cooled the inflammation. The nerves that ran up his brain were the most damaged, unsurprisingly. She didn’t ask him to activate his sharingan again, she needed his deactivated form to heal first before she decided to really dig into his eyes.

“Okay,” She inhaled slightly winded, she didn’t remove her healing chakra from his temples, “Open your eyes slowly. 

The elder Uchiha’s eyes were so dark, like magma when it cooled, charcoal and soot. It wasn’t a true black, but it was heavy and thick. She counted his eyelashes and settled her chakra deeper into him one last time. Clearing her throat, she moved back slightly and asked him, “How does it feel?”

Shisui couldn’t quite remember a time when his vision was so clear, it was precise and he _blinked_. He focused his eyes on the medic in front of her and he was struck by how _green_ her eyes were. They were clear and lively, but somehow they burned him—like she was never meant to be anything but _burning._ Burning and breathing, an untouchable flame, that flickered like a match. Lashes dark as rose and lips raw, chapped and bitten. Her hair was pink—pink as a pearl and maybe he was disappointed, disappointed in himself because he didn’t realize that Sakura was really, _really_ pretty.

Shisui didn’t answer, instead, his fingers traced the sensitive skin of her bottom lip, fascinated with the way her blood seemed to follow the drag of his finger.

Sakura pulled back and resisted the urge to lick her lips at the tingly sensation his finger. She breathed unevenly, “I think that’s enough morphine for you.”

She unhooked the IV and washed her hands that were sticky with his dried blood. She didn’t understand why her heartbeat was _ringing_ in her ears nor the fact that her mouth was dry—maybe she was nervous, did Shisui make her nervous? Maybe a little. She wasn’t used to whatever the hell _that_ was, she dried her hands and turned to look back at him.

“I’m just going to give you a quick scan,” Sakura said swiftly, she swiped over his forehead checking for any chakra burns or tears—quickly metabolizing the morphine out of his system.

“You have a mole,” He said suddenly, his eyes slid over her face and it was like he was touching her but he _wasn’t_ , he continued “Right under your lip.”

She blinked, “I do?”

“It’s very small,” Shisui answered softly, “A freckle.”

“I see.”

It was getting weird, she realized with bafflement. A freckle. Either his eyes were really good or he was just being _Shisui._ Though, Shisui wasn’t really – she wanted to rip her hair out – she didn’t really understand Shisui, because every time she thought she had him down, he shattered her perception with the grace of a cat and then some.

“No eye strain for a week,” Sakura ordered, she crossed her arms under her chest, “Absolutely none. I can get you a prescription for a pair of glasses for reading, but absolutely _no_ sharingan. You need your natural eyes to heal first before activating your dojutsu.”

Shisui nodded slowly, but still, he remained on the cot, just watching her. She shifted uneasily underneath the scrutiny of his gaze, she inquired with a sharp edge to match her tone, “What?”

His voice heavy with honesty, “You’re really pretty.”

And it was _unreasonable_ how quick her heart leaped in her throat. Sure, she was used to the occasional flirt, the indifferent lingers and the teasing of her teammates, but for someone, who wasn’t a teammate, or a colleague, or someone she associated herself with—for someone to genuinely tell her this and _mean_ it—!

“Well I would hope that I’m not ugly,” She said breezily, though there was a small hitch in her voice from the absurdity of it all.

Shisui frowned, “What will it take for you to accept a compliment?”

He wasn’t playing fair. Her stomach was queasy, _it’s not fair_ how a few words and quiet look could make her feel like a twelve-year-old again. Like everything was brand new, like she had no experience with boys and how everything became so _new_ with him. She felt nervous and hot all over.

“I just don’t get compliments,” She shrugged, she tried to brazen it out as best as she could, but she can’t help the way her hands shook underneath her chest, “Surely you could understand.”

But Shisui didn’t understand and he admitted so, “I don’t.”

And Sakura, Sakura didn’t have an answer for that. She looked over his chart, wrote something else on the bottom of the clipboard, then she pulled out another piece of paper jotted something down and handed it to him, “Here, give it to Sora-san in optometry on the third floor. Your glasses should be ready by tomorrow.”

She was deflecting and he knew it.

Shisui stood up slowly, she watched him warily, he was a good two heads taller than her, her  nose barely brushing his collarbone, she took a step back to get some distance – she was pretty sure her heart was having palpitations – she wasn’t sure what to do. She inhaled deeply, attempting to relax her muscles and she already regretted it because _he_ was all that she could smell.

“When should I come for the final check-up?”

Sakura blinked at the sudden question, “Friday.”

Shisui nodded slowly, his eyes raked her form slowly and _really_ , what was she _supposed_ to do? He said, “Sakura.”

She could feel it, it was a trap—it was the foundations of a trap. His voice was svelte, sweet and it was _calling_ her— _luring_ her and she _hated_ herself for responding, “Yeah?”

Shisui’s finger found its way back to her bottom lip, his thumb this time, it rubbed over the protruding flesh slowly, affectionately and he asked gently, “Will I being seeing you soon?”

And _fuck_ him for being so considerate and _rational_.

Sakura nodded, hands heavy. 

He smiled crookedly, tapped her lips suggestively and disappeared.

She was _doomed._


	9. hopeless longing

"Why are you sulking?" Ino asked with a raised brow, she paused mid-swipe, deep red nail polish glittering from the bristles.

Sakura was  _not_ sulking, she was  _moping_ , "Because Naruto and Sasuke and Kakashi-sensei and my  _replacement_ ," her lips dripped with sarcasm, "Are on a mission that was given based on my intel from the Suna mission!"

"So?"

"So I should've gone!" Sakura growled, rolling over onto her stomach she sighed, "What was Tsunade-sama  _thinking_?"

"That the boys should handle it while you take over the hospital?" Ino quipped she assessed her fingernails once before grabbing a clear coat from the bottom of her desk.

"I mean I can't even get mad because my  _replacement_ was one of ROOT's shinobi," She scowled, "He's a conditioned soldier, so I feel bad. I mean— _ugh_."

Ino paused and then frowned, "Tsunade-sama is employing more and more ROOT shinobi on regular missions. I remember Tou-chan said something about assimilation."

"Yeah," Sakura blew a strand of hair that lay against her lips, "Tsunade-sama wants to de-condition them. It's a work in progress, so I can't be too mad."

"Have you met him?"

"My replacement?"

"Yeah."

She shook her head, "No, they left before I could say goodbye."

Ino frowned at that. Surely it couldn't be  _that_ bad that they had to practically run out of the village unless something had happened yesterday and Sakura refused to speak to her teammates about. That something, being so  _awkward_ and uncomfortable that she couldn't bear to talk to her teammates. "What happened yesterday?"

"Yesterday?"

The blonde scowled annoyed with having to repeat herself, "Yesterday. What did you do?"

"I was training and then I had dinner with Naruto and Sasuke."

Sakura had forgotten just  _who_ she was speaking to, her father worked in T&I and if there was one thing Ino knew, it was when Sakura was  _lying._ She sniffed for a trail and then snapped her jaw, "What happened with Shisui-san?"

Sakura stiffened.

And Ino  _smiled._

"Well?"

Sakura bit the inside of her cheek, she didn't want to lie to her best friend, but she also was  _not_ in the mood to talk about what had transpired yesterday and the hospital or this  _morning._ So she waited.

Ino raised a brow.

She groaned, "I trained with Shisui yesterday."

Blue eyes blinked harmlessly, "Oh?"

But there was nothing  _harmless_ about Yamanaka Ino.

"We trained," Sakura pressed, "Then we were going to get dango after I practically limped out of the training field and then we ran into Naruto and Sasuke."

Ino grimaced.

"And you  _know_ how Naruto and Sasuke talk," She frowned, "Recklessly, stupidly. Just like—"

"—boys. Yeah," She sighed, "I know."

"So I don't know what happened after because I left," Sakura explained, she grabbed a champagne-color nail polish, "But Shisui, Naruto and Sasuke both showed up at my apartment an hour later all bruised and injured. Shisui bought dinner and I can only assume that he beat the hell out of my teammates," her lips twitched, "So I can't really complain."

"Beating up your teammates for disrespecting you?" Ino quirked a brow, "Where can I get an Uchiha Shisui?"

But it was the slight flicker in Sakura's eyes that made Ino's claws sharpen, she breathed, "What did he  _do_?"

And Sakura folded like a house of cards.

Ino sat at the foot of her bed, nails wet and ears twitchy as her best friend told her tale. She added in hand gestures, huffs of breaths and flushing—Sakura was  _flushing._ She was  _flustered._

So Ino, she lifted a perfectly manicured nail, and accentuated, "You lucky bitch."

* * *

 

Going to Ino was a bad idea, Sakura soon realized, because now, the only thing she could think of, was Shisui. She wanted to talk to Ino about this—whatever this was because it's only been a couple of days since she started seeing Shisui regularly. She blinked rapidly—seeing as in she was  _seeing_ him, visually, she tried to remind herself or maybe she was just trying to convince herself.

It had to be the morphine.

It  _was_  the morphine.

It was the  _only_ explanation.

Still, Ino just made her think about him  _more_ and she didn't want to over-analyze his every move or word or breath.

Sakura shook her head and groaned. She should pick up a few more shifts at the hospital, but first thing's first—she wanted her goddam  _tempura._ Swinging by  _Kyoto's_  – she subtly chakra swept the shop and was relieved to not feel an Uchiha within her tempura-loving vicinity – then she mentally slapped herself, because she was  _not_ hiding, she was just being cautious.

_Cautious._

"Sakura-chan!" Kyoko greeted her with a bright smile, she wiped her hands with a nearby dishtowel, "You're early. We're still packing the bag."

She blinked, "Early? What are you talking about? Packing?"

"Ah yes, your order," She rummaged behind the counter, grabbing a plastic bag, "I was surprised though. You never usually order lunch ahead of time, usually you order when you get here," she placed the Tupperware and some napkins into the bag, "Here you go!"

Sakura stared at the bag that was shoved into her arms, "But I didn't—"

"And I must say," Kyoko went on, she blinked her dazedly and giggled, "I think it's so  _cute_ for Shisui-san to buy you lunch. I know you work very hard at the hospital Sakura-chan, so please eat and keep up your strength!"

Green eyes were wide with disbelief.

How did Shisui even know that she was going to come to  _Kyoto's_ for lunch? How did he know what to order?—why did  _he_ buy her lunch? She could've scratched her brain with a toothpick and she still wouldn't have come up with an answer. She numbly accepted the bag and walked toward the hospital. She hasn't seen Shisui since this morning—which was  _weird_.

It was weird because, she didn't know where he disappeared to, after his little  _dispute_ this morning, she went straight to Ino's and then to  _Kyoto's._ Now she was going back to the hospital to do an extra round and then she would do some late grocery shopping—anything to remove Shisui from her brain.

—

"Do you feel cold, at all?" Sakura asked Shin, her patient, he was roughly seven years old and he swung his legs as she moved the stethoscope over his back.

"Sometimes," His voice was scratchy, "And sometimes I fall asleep when Kaa-chan talks to me."

The pink-haired medic nodded and scribbled something on her chart. She turned to look at Shin's mother with a tired smile, "He's fine. Just the flu, make sure he drinks lots of water and rests a lot. I sent a prescription down the pharmacy downstairs, just follow the directions on the bottle and he'll be fine in a few days."

"Thank you, Haruno-san."

The day went by slowly and Sakura began to feel antsy mid-way through her shift. She could've ripped her hair out of her scalp—what was  _wrong_ with her? She was acting all broody—hell, she was acting like  _Sasuke._ She wanted to run and she wanted relief. She felt on edge, like something—something was missing or something was aching.

She was  _miserable._

Soon, there was an ANBU squad wheeling into the ER and well, she thought morbidly, at least it was something she can focus on. She assessed: a few broken ribs, punctured lungs, and a shattered femur. Chakra glowing and head clearing, Sakura healed.

Sometime between four and five did she finally leave the hospital. She wasn't exhausted, but she wasn't restless and that had to count for something. Maybe she needed to drain her reserves a little to keep the itch from spreading, it was kind of irritating to keep herself settled.

Sakura grabbed a handbasket from the open market stall and walked over to the produce section. Grabbing a half dozen apples, she tossed it into a plastic bag and placed it into her basket. She was torn between buying jasmine rice and short-grain rice, frowning, she decided to pick the jasmine type instead.

It was cheaper.

"I thought you couldn't cook," Shisui's voice was sudden, bright, but it was deep enough to send a cold waft of air down her spine.

She flinched, the handbasket jostling in her hand and she spun around abruptly. Eyes wide, she blurted out, "What?"

He glanced down at her handbasket and repeated his statement patiently, "I thought you couldn't cook."

Sakura stared and then she looked down to her grocery basket, she exhaled exasperatedly, "Oh. That. Well, I can cook  _some_ things," she rolled her eyes, "Naruto likes to exaggerate."

Shisui smiled nonetheless, he swiftly took hold of her grocery basket in one hand and maneuvered her to the meat section, "So you're going to make dinner?"

"I was going to attempt to," She said slowly as she watched him hold her basket and skimmed down the aisles. She rolled her eyes, she scanned the rows of meat and she decided on some pork and chicken, "I was thinking udon."

"Udon?" He looked thoughtful and nodded at her selections of meat when she placed the two parcels into the basket, "Are you going to use tofu or mushrooms?"

Sakura looked a little thrown at the randomness of the conversation, she chewed her bottom lip, it sounded like she was asking a question "Both?"

Shisui nodded, "That's good. I like spinach in mine."

"And I thought  _I_ was the health nut."

He laughed at that, "You don't like putting vegetables in soup?"

She shook her head, "I prefer simplicity when it comes to soups."

"Like miso?"

"Probably one of the best kinds of soup," She replied, she grabbed a pack of silken tofu in the soy aisle, "Plus it's easy to make."

"I'm sure that's why it's the best," Shisui teased her, his fingers ran up the threads of her medic vest before ruffling her hair.

Sakura rolled her eyes and muttered under her breath, "I'm not  _that_ bad."

She crouched low to grab some green onions from the brown basket next to the ginger and garlic section. The aromatics hung near the floor of the vegetable aisle. Her fingers combed through green, long strands before she decided on a good handful and when she stood up, she nearly gasped when her nose brushed his.

She hadn't realized that Shisui stood so close to her. He smelled like sunshine and rainwater and something earthy, it made her dizzy and warm. She blinked rapidly, she dug her fingernails into the palm of her hand to distract herself and then asked quickly, "Where are your glasses?"

Shisui blinked slowly, long lashes brushing his cheeks and his hand subtly tightened over the handle of her grocery basket, "What?"

"Your glasses," Sakura used anger as a diversion towards her attraction – her sudden revelation towards her own feelings was brain-stopping and  _fuck_ her life she was attracted to Uchiha Shisui – for him, because, for her sanity and her own mental health, she needed to  _focus_ , "Why aren't you wearing them?"

"I picked it up an hour ago," He answered easily, "It's in my pocket."

She spoke slowly, as if he were a child, "So. Put it on."

"Well," Shisui lifted the grocery basket in front of her as if she didn't have a ten-pound bag of rice, various vegetables and meat in it, the other hand held her delicate bag of herbs, "I kind of have my hands full."

"I  _can_ carry my groceries," Sakura pointed out.

He smiled knowingly, "I know."

Sakura, half-serious, half-exasperated, wished that he would stop smiling at her because her stomach felt like it was going to drop to her knees. She sighed instead, "Which pocket?"

Shisui quirked a brow in quiet surprise and then his eyes glinted with mischief, he nudged his left leg out, "This one."

She tried to ignore how intimate it was to shove her hand into his pocket, how the hard muscle of his thigh flexed against her cloth-covered fingertips, how her hair brushed the bottom of his shirt, how the heat of his abdomen radiated against her cheek, she bit her tongue and pulled out a thin case. Opening the case, she opened the thick, black-rimmed square glasses and carefully placed them onto his face. Her fingers took their time tucking the malleable plastic behind his ears, the frames resting gently on his high cheekbones, thumb brushing his cheek absently and she asked, "How's it feel?"

Shisui blinked at the sudden clarity, it wasn't like how it was earlier, somehow his vision felt sharper and Sakura seemed brighter, "Perfect," he looked at her deliberately then, "Really perfect."

Sakura felt somewhere inside her curl and burn, then she cleared her throat, "You need to use your glasses for at least five hours a day, if not more. I know I said that they are for reading, but you can still use them."

He nodded in acceptance.

She shifted her attention to her grocery basket and decided she needed some flour to make the fried chicken. Grabbing a half a pound of flour she made her way to check out, "I got it from here, Shisui."

Shisui raised a brow as she rummaged in her pouch for her wallet, "Who's going to carry your bags back to your place?"

"I can bench press, you, my teammates and Itachi-san altogether without breaking a sweat," Sakura deadpanned and paid the cashier, "I'm sure I can manage a few bags."

He frowned and decided to press, just a little, "I don't think you understand."

Sakura blinked and then scowled as she grabbed her bags, "Alright then, I  _don't_  understand. What are you trying to say?"

Shisui grabbed her grocery bags with one arm, a bag resting in between his elbow crease, one in the palm of his hand, and then he used his free hand to hold her's. He pulled her close, even as they walked out of the open market, through the village path, they walked hand in hand, and then he asked softly, "Do you understand now?"

And Sakura could hardly hear him, not with her heart beating in her ears like that.

* * *

 

"Sakura, I said slice. Not  _mince_ ," Shisui huffed a chuckle as he watched her chop the mushrooms into well, dust.

"What's the difference?" Sakura grumbled, she was a medic. She chopped organs and sliced blood vessels, so why was this so  _hard_?

She tried not to flinch when warm hands engulfed hers, it was like a scene out of a shoujo manga if she had to compare  _this_ to something – she tried not to snort with incredulity – his fingers pressed her hands downwards, he rolled the mushroom over and demonstrated long cuts, he commanded, "Like this. Pretend it's a fish."

Sakura stared at him as he walked in front of the counter and took a seat. He watched her with dark eyes, black frames glinting from the overhead light, she was baffled, "Like fish?"

"When you started medical ninjutsu, didn't use a fish?"

"How did  _you_ know that?" She narrowed her eyebrows.

"I did the same thing," He nodded, "I only know basic ninjutsu—anyway, slice the mushroom as if it was a fish, you don't want it too small, you want the mushroom to float."

Sakura hesitated, then she cut a small sliver of the mushroom, her hand was shaking, but it was easier, her control was distorted because she was trying to ignore the fact that Shisui was watching her like a goddamn  _hawk._ As if his presence wasn't nerve-wracking enough, being subjected to his focus made her spine stiffen into steel and her nerves all jumpy. She paused, "Did I do it?"

Shisui leaned over the counter and laughed, "Yeah. I told you, you just need practice."

Sakura's shoulders slumped in relief, "I'm not very good at this."

"So you've told me," He replied and grabbed the green onions, "Now, cut these diagonally."

She muttered something colorful underneath her breath and followed his orders carefully. After she slowly prepared the ingredients, placed the herbs in small bowls, grabbed the necessary tools, she took a seat at the counter and watched Shisui pour oil into the pot.

"I think frying chicken is too much for a beginner like you," He said lightly, "I'll fry the chicken and you can watch."

She glared, "You're patronizing me."

"Teasing, Sakura," Shisui emphasized amusedly, "Teasing."

Sakura huffed, "Where did you learn medical ninjutsu?"

He grabbed the seasoned chicken from the sink, dredged the meat in egg, flour and then breadcrumbs, he replied, "My mom."

She furrowed her brows, "I thought your mom wasn't a shinobi."

"She's not," Shisui nodded and placed the meat in the oil, "But she did know medical ninjutsu, just the basic one—mystic palm I think? And the other one you use to set bones? I can't remember all the names."

"So," Sakura started slowly, "You can heal yourself?"

"Only basic cuts and gashes," He wrinkled his nose, "Anything deeper than a fingernail and wider than a palm I can't heal."

"I could teach you," She offered.

Shisui looked up after turning the chicken breasts with a pair of chopsticks, his eyebrows raised and breathed a chuckle, "And miss you healing me? I think not."

Sakura refused to flush, she bit the inside of her cheek and retorted, "I can teach you how to heal superficial wounds. If you're in the field it could save your life."

"I appreciate the offer Sakura," He said humbly, "But my chakra control isn't  _that_  good."

"So says your shunshin,"

Shisui rolled his eyes, "Shunshin is a D-rank jutsu, I just," he paused, "Perfected it."

"Humble too," Sakura grimaced and settled into her chair, "Fine. I won't push you."

"Don't look at me like that," He frowned, taking out the chicken out of the oil, he set the meat on a plate lined with paper towel, "I mean it. Medical ninjutsu is a lot harder than people think. My chakra control is great, but it's not in the  _ninety-ninth_ percentile."

Green eyes glittered, "Are you saying my chakra control is better than yours?"

"You know it is," Shisui scoffed and placed more meat into the oil, "Why should I argue with a fact?"

"Now you're just trying to flatter me," Sakura retorted, her ears burning, but her smile was pleasant. She felt relatively better than she did all day, him leaving this morning left her feeling buoyant, like she was oddly out of place, and she was not  _mooning_ over him. She paused, she  _wasn't._ She was just antsy because she didn't know where she stood with him and it was the fucking  _morphine—_ not him.

It couldn't be him.

"I don't need to flatter you," Shisui said suddenly, a pair of chopsticks holding a piece of fried chicken appeared in front of her, he motioned for her to open her mouth and continued, "I can just feed you."

She hesitated for the briefest of seconds before she opened her mouth and accepted the chicken. Part of her was internally screaming because she was allowing Shisui to  _feed_ her. She chewed the meat carefully and hummed, "It's good."

"Not too salty?"

Sakura shook her head, "Nope."

"That's a relief," He exhaled, taking a scoop of soybean paste, he stirred the spoon in the water, "Miso paste is usually salty, so I try not to use too much soy sauce and since you're having fried chicken on the side and using pork in the soup," his lips wrinkled, "I can only do so much."

She laughed, "You're like a housewife."

"That was sexist, Sakura."

"Househusband?" She tried and laughed again when Shisui threw the towel at her and continued to fry the chicken, "By the way, I have spinach in the bottom drawer of the refrigerator if you want to make a salad or something."

Shisui's eyes widened and he asked uncertainly, "You want me to stay for dinner?"

Sakura frowned, "Of course. I can't eat all this food by myself."

"We only made two things: soup, chicken," He rationalized and then added, "There are those riceballs from yesterday."

"You're staying for dinner Shisui," She said firmly.

Shisui wrinkled his nose cutely, took his chopsticks and popped a piece of chicken in her mouth. He commented lightly, "You're so bossy."

She was going to retaliate and then she yelped. The piece of chicken he force-fed her was  _hot_ , the oil on the chicken was still piping, she fanned her mouth, eyes watering, her tongue felt heavy as she squeaked, "Hot—hot!"

Shisui swore quietly as he stumbled towards her, strong fingers cupped her jaw, he squeezed her cheeks gently and blew into her mouth, he apologized in between blows, "Sorry, sorry—I forgot these came straight out of the pot."

Sakura was hardly able to breathe with the way he held her, her eyes wide with wonder as his nose brushed her's, he blew into her mouth, trying to ease the pain, his mouth was puckered and for a second, she wondered what it would be like to kiss him.

Shisui's lips were pink, a soft petal pink and they made the strangest shape as he exhaled air into her mouth. The chicken wasn't burning now, but she was sure her tongue was numb from the pain of it all and she swallowed the small piece without bothering to chew. It went down roughly, but Sakura did not take her eyes off him.

She blinked slowly as he flickered his eyes up to her, her mouth was closed now, and her eyes glossy—from unshed tears or from his proximity, he didn't know. His hands still rested underneath her jaw, slowly, his thumb ran the fine line of her jawbone down to the round curve of her cheek.

Shisui breathed gently, his hands soft on her face and his eyes warm as the sun, "Sorry."

He didn't move.

Sakura couldn't find words to speak, not even as their food burned in the pot beside them, but she liked the way he held her, the way he smelled, the way he looked at her and so she said, just as quietly, "Yeah."

.

.

.


	10. always be kind

Sakura remembered the first time she went on a mission with Shisui.

They were in Yuga and it was raining.

Sakura was wet.

Normally, she would’ve decided to open her mouth and purposefully complain to Shisui, to deliberately provoke him and see that stupid smile of his, but she didn’t, because somehow this felt different.

The world felt darker and the skies were grayer.

“We can set up camp in this cave,” Shisui said, his fingers pointed towards the edge of the forest, the terrain wasn’t mountainous, but it was uneven, even the soil was loose beneath their feet.

Inhaling was slightly constricting, the humidity was thick and engulfed her senses like a wet blanket, she had asked as soon as they were settled in front of a warm fire, “Are you going to tell me what our mission is?”

He shrugged and poked the wood with a long stick, “Assassination.”

Sakura looked at him incredulously, “Assassination missions are assigned to ANBU.”

Shisui just pointed to himself a-matter-of-factly.

She rolled her eyes and clarified, “They are _solo_ missions.”

He hummed in agreement and took a seat next to her, “Generally they are, but the details of this mission require a lot more discretion.”

She furrowed her brows, “What does that mean?”

Truthfully, Shisui didn’t want to tell her the details.

Tsunade had summoned him mid-morning, he left his breakfast half-eaten with Itachi and made his way to the Hokage tower. It went something like this:

“Hokage-sama,” Shisui had greeted her with a bow.

“Shisui,” Tsunade looked tired, her fingers grabbed the white scroll from the corner of her desk and tossed it to him, she sounded apologetic, “I really didn’t want to send you out in the field until you’ve recovered from your last _strenuous_ mission,” she elucidated, “That includes your mental health, but you are probably the only Uchiha I know that’s stealthier than Itachi.”

Shisui wasn’t sure to feel flattered or humbled by her consideration for him, maybe it was because she was a medical ninja and she understood, or perhaps, she felt guilty that part of his life was sacrificed for the good of the village, still, he waited, “Hokage-sama?”

“It’s an A-ranked assassination mission, usually I would classify this as an S-rank considering that this requires ANBU level skills, but,” she thinned her lips, “I have to declassify it because I’m sending you with Sakura.”

He stilled, “Declassify?”

“Sakura is not a part of ANBU,” Tsunade stated bluntly, “And we have a very low number of medics in ANBU, you’re going to need a medic for this mission, because _she’s_ going to do the assassination, and you have to protect her.”

“Wouldn’t it be better to send a team?”

“Discretion is key,” she replied, amber orbs hardened, “The target is Takashi Hito, he’s a human trafficker for the Akatsuki. There have been rumors of him recruiting hired muscle for the group, it’s in a small village on the border of Kumo and because of the fragile political…relationship Konoha has with them, it’s imperative that never know that we were involved.”

Shisui immediately picked up, “You want him to die of natural causes.”

“ _Natural_ being the keyword,” Tsunade affirmed.

Shisui wasn’t sure he was comfortable allowing Sakura to do the assassination, killing was clinical – which was probably why Sakura was a good candidate for ANBU – he didn’t want to subject her to that sort of thing while he was there. He didn’t want it to become a necessity for her. He didn’t like killing, he preferred escort and espionage missions. He felt a little less human when he was forced to kill.

 _The intent to kill_ was a disassociating tactic, it was meant to scare genin and academy children, but it was so very real when you were in the field because it was kill or be killed.

He shook his head to clear the thoughts, “Our target is Takashi Hito and he has ties to the Akatsuki,” Shisui explained, “We have to make it look like he died of natural causes because his base is in Kumo.”

Sakura nodded at the political reasoning, “I assume I’m going to do the assassination?”

His lips thinned at her question, “Yes, but I would understand if you do not want to.”

She blinked, “I’m sorry?”

“As a medic I know it’s not easy to take lives,” Shisui stated blandly, so blandly that his tone could’ve been taken for casual or nonchalant.

Sakura could hardly believe what she was hearing, “Why would I have a problem with killing?”

For a second, words had failed him. Part of him didn’t want to consider that scenario – her raining in blood, drenched to the teeth in crimson and her jeweled-colored orbs glazing over – it made him _sick_. The loss of innocence, part of him mourned for it, for himself, for Itachi, but _never_ Sakura, he never wanted to see Sakura become jaded, because Sakura reminded him of all the good that was _left_ in the world. Call it selfish, but he wanted to shield her from it.

“I don’t know,” he replied confused by his own emotions, perhaps, he was feeling protective over her and maybe it was clouding his judgment. He didn’t like the way she made him second guess things, actions for one, his plans and then his thoughts.

“I can do it, Shisui,” Sakura confirmed his hesitation, her eyes were hard—her fists tightened.

And he _certainly_ didn’t like the conviction in her voice.

From Yuga to Kumo was a three days journey – passing through Shimogakure wasn’t exactly a pleasant experience – Sakura hated the cold, sure the snow was pretty from a distance, but her nose was frozen and she’s pretty sure the end of her hair had some icicles forming. Kumo for one wasn’t as cold as Shimo, but the air was dryer and the wind was sharper.

“There’s an inn near the market,” Shisui told her, his hand found its way to her lower back – more of a cover type of suggestion – he continued, “I can’t guarantee a hot meal until we have the perimeter set.”

She nodded, “Anywhere is fine.”

Sakura trusted Shisui with her life and that trust didn’t come so easily. He was Sasuke’s cousin first of all and that was enough to keep her on her toes, but regardless of his intimidating shinobi reputation, Shisui was warm and charming, and that was dangerous. To be lulled into such a state of false security, that was terrifying on its own and she didn’t have that type of strength to deflect once she was secured.

But if he _did_ mean it…

“One room, please,” Shisui requested politely, his hand rested gently on his partner’s shoulder.

The old lady smiled knowingly and gave the duo a key. Their cover was never discussed, Shisui’s attentiveness was enough of an answer. The inn was not extravagant, it was a basic type of bed and breakfast, meant for sleep and the occasional meal. It was a one bedroom with an open bath, a toilet and a sink hiding behind a slide-in door and a small closet.

“I’ll set up a perimeter, would you like anything in particular for dinner?” Shisui asked thoughtfully.

Sakura furrowed her brows at the request, “Have you been here before?”

He blinked at that, “A couple of times. They make a really good stew.”

“Then we can have that,” She shrugged, opening up her pack, she grabbed a simple yukata, switching her sandals for slippers, “I’m not really picky. We should scout the area.”

“I’ll be back in ten, then,” He said quietly and used shunshin to disappear.

Sakura took that window of opportunity to take a swift shower, the shower curtain hung around a square, the bathtub knee-deep, she wouldn’t have felt too bad if there was a door for privacy, but with the curtain being the only item that gave her privacy, she couldn’t help but finish just as quickly.

Shisui, Sakura thought certainly, was acting differently. She supposed it was because they were on a mission, he was much more pensive and more Uchiha-like – so to speak – a real shinobi, and she wasn’t really sure how to feel about it.

—

The assassination was quite frankly, simple. Sakura had infiltrated the compound, chakra suppressed to the bone and using her new and improved shunshin, she managed to slip past their defenses and slide into the corner of his study. Shisui was directing her from the rooftop, his fingers trailing the blueprints and his eyes sharingan-red. He spoke in hushed tones into his mic, his chakra a muted charcoal and instructed her to move just as quietly.

Sakura waited until he was in his chair before she used the blunt edge of her hand to quickly knock out Hito. Shisui cast a large scale genjutsu to immerse the presence of her chakra into an interwoven fabric of energy because once she summoned chakra into her hands, she was a living target.  Pouring chakra into the bruise, she healed all superficial and internal wounds. She only had thirty seconds before his consciousness started to prickle.

Pushing chakra into his chest, she managed to mimic a heart attack, medical interest took place as she watched his body fade into a pallor, deeming him lifeless, she grabbed as much intel – battle plans, papers, scrolls, books, and diagrams – as possible and shoved them into her medic pouch.

“Regroup in thirty,” Sakura murmured into her mic, she flickered to the window and disappeared into the darkness.

Shisui met her half-way in the forest, she nodded towards him and he spoke first, “Done?”

“Done.”

He nodded and they ran out of Kumo like death was at their door.

—

Now, they were back in the cave.

“I don’t want to say it,” Sakura frowned, she poked the fire this time, “But this mission was kind of easy.”

Shisui laughed and it wasn’t a pleasant sound. It was harsh, sharp and more importantly, tired. “Assassinations are usually messy, bloody and the body count tends to be a lot more.”

“Did you do a lot of assassination missions?” She asked part of her wasn’t sure if she wanted an answer.

“I did,” He nodded, “I didn’t want to, but it was for Konoha.”

_For Konoha._

Sakura watched him for a little bit, she didn’t need an explanation because somehow she _knew_. She _knew_ him and maybe, she could’ve had a bit more tact when she asked bluntly, “Did you ever go to therapy for your PTSD?”

Shisui stiffened.

Sakura winced at her senselessness, she could’ve been a bit more sensitive, she softened her tone and spoke honestly, “I don’t know how long you were in ANBU, I don’t know what they made you do, I don’t know how to deal with loss, I don’t know a lot of things about you,” she paused, eyes kind, “But, I know suffering and I know how it can eat you from the inside out. You don’t have to tell me anything, just as long as you know that you aren’t alone.”

She didn’t look at him after that nor did she bother to wait for a reply, instead she took out her scroll and began to read from it. She felt herself twist nervously at the silence, because what was she supposed to say now? Had she spoken out of bounds? Did she say something wrong? She didn’t know how to brazen the situation out, maybe if she ignored it, the tension in her would disappear.

But the tension didn’t disappear.

The tension got tighter when Shisui got up and took a seat next to her.

Shisui didn’t say anything and Sakura was grateful for that.

Shisui was born in a war-torn era, he was forced to kill, to take life at such a young age, he was a pacifist, and he didn’t—he couldn’t let go of those horrors even if he tried and maybe, Sakura never _really_ knew him at all.

She was blessed to be born in an era of peace or what looked like peace – silent warring was always confused her – she wasn’t forced to become jaded, she grew up at her own pace and had freedom at her fingertips. As a medic, Sakura had to become acquainted with death, it wasn’t something she could ignore and it wasn’t something she could stop. She had to learn to cope or the pressure would eat her alive.

But Shisui never learned to cope, he took that pain with him and carried it on his shoulders.

And it hurt Sakura to think that he believed that it was necessary for him to carry that burden.

Even as he sat next to her, his legs brushing her’s, he fell asleep, his head resting against the wall, and she watched as the nightmares plagued him. They were quiet tremors, silent with the stuttering taps of his breathing, they were experienced nightmares – she shuffled closer to him – not knowing what or how to help him without pushing the lines of professionalisms, she pressed herself closer to him, so that he could feel that she was there, even in his unconscious state—it was enough.

It wasn’t easy, but it was enough.

The warmth of her body relaxed him and his head dropped down to her shoulder.

Sakura exhaled gently.

When it came to Shisui, nothing was easy.

_Nothing._

.

.

.


End file.
